Judith Blackstone is a pioneering teacher of contemporary spirituality best known for developing The Realization Process, a direct path toward nondual awakening. With Sounds True, she has most recently published the book Trauma and the Unbound Body. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon speaks with Judith about applying The Realization Process to the healing process—whether it’s physical, relational, or psychological. They discuss the Process’s application to unprocessed trauma—especially how fully inhabiting the body can highlight long-term physical constrictions. Tami and Judith talk about the methods for releasing that constriction, as well as the difference between awareness of the body and inhabiting it. Finally, Judith leads listeners in a core breath practice for settling into the body and attuning to the fundamental consciousness that is always available to us. (57 minutes)
Tami’s Takeaway: As part of our conversation about “disentangling the constrictions” that are held in the body as a result of trauma, Judith Blackstone teaches one of the central practices of The Realization Process—the Core Breath Practice. This is a powerful technique for quickly entering the subtle core of the body (a vertical channel that is described in many spiritual traditions). Once we enter this subtle core, we have a powerful resource available to us for releasing traumatic experiences held in the body. The takeaway: do the Core Breath Practice regularly as a way to stay in deep inward contact and “unbind the body.”
Judith Blackstone, PhD, is a psychotherapist and innovative teacher in contemporary spirituality. She developed the Realization Process®, an embodied approach to personal and relational healing and nondual realization. She is the author of Trauma and the Unbound Body, Belonging Here, The Intimate Life, The Enlightenment Process, and The Empathic Ground.For more, see realizationprocess.org.
Subscribe to Insights at the Edge to hear all of Tami’s interviews (transcripts available too!), featuring Eckhart Tolle, Caroline Myss, Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield, Adyashanti, and many more.
Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.
We find ourselves in a time that is rich with paths toward spiritual awakening, especially that pinnacle of awakening called “nonduality.”
The Fullness of the Ground is my contribution to that abundance. It describes in detail the lived experience of nondual realization.
In the book, I offer a series of gentle attunement practices, called the Realization Process, for uncovering and knowing ourselves as a fundamental, undivided dimension of consciousness, pervading our whole body and environment. Pervading our body, fundamental consciousness is experienced as the authentic ground of our individual being. Pervading our body and environment, it is the basis of our oneness with everyone and everything around us. This means that we become whole as individuals at the same time as we transcend our individuality and experience unity with our surroundings.
As a longtime spiritual teacher and psychotherapist, I feel that there is not enough emphasis in some of the nonduality teachings about how this realization enriches our lives. I have been particularly concerned about teachings that encourage people to disconnect from themselves as individuals or to suppress their emotional responses to the world around them. In this book, I instead offer a path to nondual realization that is deeply embodied and that matures us as individuals, at the same time that it opens us to self–other oneness. Far from erasing us as individuals, nondual realization enhances our experience of our own unique existence. It deepens all of our human capacities, including our ability to feel, to think, and to enjoy our lives. It can help heal and enhance our relationships with other people by enabling us to experience deep contact with others without losing inward contact with ourselves.
Central to the method in this book is the important difference between being aware of the body and inhabiting the body. So I often begin with this simple exercise for experiencing this distinction:
Sit upright with your hands in your lap.
Take a moment to become aware of your hands. You may notice how warm or cold they are or how tense or relaxed they are. This is becoming aware of your hands.
Now enter into your hands. Experience yourself as present, living within your hands. This is inhabiting your hands.
You can go on to inhabiting different parts of your body and, finally, your body as a whole. See if you can feel present everywhere within your body, rather than aware of it from the outside.
In the Realization Process, we go through several steps, taking around 30 minutes, to reach this next part. But, for a very shortened version, if you can feel that you are living within your body, then next find the space outside of your body, the space in your environment.
Let yourself experience that the space inside and outside of your body is the same undivided space. Without leaving your body, experience that the space that pervades your body also pervades your whole environment. This is the spacious expanse of fundamental consciousness.
Judith Blackstone, PhD
Judith Blackstone, PhD, is a psychotherapist and innovative teacher in contemporary spirituality. She developed the Realization Process®, an embodied approach to personal and relational healing and nondual realization. She is the author of Trauma and the Unbound Body, Belonging Here, The Intimate Life, The Enlightenment Process, and The Empathic Ground.
When we attune to ourselves as fundamental consciousness, we
find that this pervasive space is not empty in the sense of void. Even though
it is experienced as stillness, it is lively, luminous stillness.
In my method, the Realization Process, I attempt to avoid
metaphysical assertions about what fundamental consciousness actually is or
what qualities it actually possesses. However, an important part of the
Realization Process, for both healing from trauma and for spiritual awakening,
is to attune to specific qualities that appear to be inherent in this lively
pervasive space. These qualities, which we can attune to pervading everywhere,
are experienced as the fundamental qualities of our own being. In this work, we name these qualities: awareness,
emotion, and physical sensation. Attuning to these three qualities can help
us feel whole within ourselves and unified with our surroundings.
Before we go further, by “quality,” I mean the “feel” of our experience. A distinguishing characteristic of a quality is that it cannot be translated into a direct description of the experience. For example, the quality of love, exactly how it feels, cannot really be conveyed to someone who has not experienced it. We can talk about the experience—we can say that love is warm or that it causes us to want to connect with someone that we feel this toward, but we cannot put into words the exact experience of love itself. In the same way, we cannot convey, to someone who has not experienced it, the color red, the taste of vanilla, or the sensation of coldness. This is true for all of the many qualities that make up our experience, including the unchanging qualities of fundamental consciousness.
We attune to each quality through a different section of our body. We attune to the ground of awareness in, around, and above our head. By awareness, I mean that part of the ground within which perceptions and thoughts occur. We attune to the ground of emotion in the mid-third of our body—our chest and midsection. By emotion, I mean that part of the ground within which emotions, such as grief, anger, and joy, occur. We attune to physical sensation through the bottom third of our body—our lower torso, legs, and feet. By physical sensation, I mean that part of the ground in which physical sensations such as heat and sexual pleasure occur.
We need to be attuned to all three qualities of fundamental
consciousness in order to reach our most subtle and most complete experience of
ourselves and the world around us. The blend of awareness, emotion, and
physical sensation pervading everywhere helps us attune to and resonate with
the awareness, emotion, and physical sensation in other people and in all of
nature.
PRACTICE: Attuning to
Fundamental Consciousness
Sit upright with your feet on the floor. Keep your eyes open.
Feel that you are inside your whole body at once. Find the
space outside your body, the space in the room. Experience that the space
inside and outside your body is the same, continuous space. It pervades you.
Experience that the space pervading your own body also pervades your whole
environment. Do not move from within your body to do this: attune to the space
that seems to already be there, pervading you and your environment.
Attune to the quality
of awareness. This means becoming aware of your awareness. Attune to
awareness around, within, and way above your head. Experience the quality of
awareness pervading your whole body so that it feels like you are made of the
quality of awareness. Experience the quality of awareness pervading your whole
body and environment at the same time.
Attune to the quality
of emotion. Sense the quality of emotion in the middle of your body: your
chest and gut. Experience the quality of emotion pervading your whole body so
that it feels like you are made of the quality of emotion. This is not a
specific emotion; it is the subtle ground of emotion. Experience the quality of
emotion pervading your whole body and environment at the same time.
Attune to the quality
of physical sensation. Come down into the bottom of your torso, legs, and
feet to attune to the quality of physical sensation. Experience the quality of
physical sensation pervading your whole body so that it feels like you are made
of the quality of physical sensation. Again, this is not a specific physical
sensation; it is the subtle ground of physical sensation. Experience the
quality of physical sensation pervading your whole body and environment at the
same time.
Now experience the quality of physical sensation pervading
your whole body and environment and the quality of awareness pervading your
whole body and environment at the same time. Add the quality of emotion
pervading your whole body and environment. At this point, the qualities blend
together; they become indistinguishable from each other.
Sit for a moment in this rich field of awareness, emotion, and physical sensation, pervading your body and environment.
Judith Blackstone, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychotherapist in New York and an innovative teacher in contemporary spirituality. Her published works include the books Belonging Here, The Enlightenment Process, The Empathic Ground, and The Intimate Life, as well as the audio learning course The Realization Process.
Buy your copy of Trauma
and the Unbound Body at your favorite bookseller!
Judith Blackstone is a pioneering teacher of contemporary spirituality best known for developing The Realization Process, a direct path toward nondual awakening. With Sounds True, she has most recently published the book Trauma and the Unbound Body. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon speaks with Judith about applying The Realization Process to the healing process—whether it’s physical, relational, or psychological. They discuss the Process’s application to unprocessed trauma—especially how fully inhabiting the body can highlight long-term physical constrictions. Tami and Judith talk about the methods for releasing that constriction, as well as the difference between awareness of the body and inhabiting it. Finally, Judith leads listeners in a core breath practice for settling into the body and attuning to the fundamental consciousness that is always available to us. (57 minutes)
Tami’s Takeaway: As part of our conversation about “disentangling the constrictions” that are held in the body as a result of trauma, Judith Blackstone teaches one of the central practices of The Realization Process—the Core Breath Practice. This is a powerful technique for quickly entering the subtle core of the body (a vertical channel that is described in many spiritual traditions). Once we enter this subtle core, we have a powerful resource available to us for releasing traumatic experiences held in the body. The takeaway: do the Core Breath Practice regularly as a way to stay in deep inward contact and “unbind the body.”
Shame has been called the master emotion because it takes over our bodies and our minds. It can freeze our nervous system. It can place us in a fog, unable to seek help, reassess a situation or reassess what is really going on. Shame defeats our ability to reflect on ourselves, get some support, and move on. Shame can be overwhelming, but if we can look at it clearly and catch it before it takes over, we can cope with it and create conditions that can transform it from an enemy into a friend.
This is not academic to us. We are both well-acquainted with the experience of shame. Co-author of Embracing Shame, Sheila Rubin has been researching shame since she was a shy five-year-old. “In my twenties, I remember having a new job and being so worried about being late for a first meeting that I showed up early and accidentally interrupted a lunch that was happening in the room,” notes Sheila. “I froze in embarrassment. I remember the shame voice saying to me: ‘What’s wrong with me? Maybe they shouldn’t hire me because something is wrong with me.’ Fortunately, while I was holding the door knob, frozen in shame, someone opened the door and invited me in with kindness.”
Embracing Shame co-author, Bret Lyon, remembers that, as a kid, when the gym teacher blew the whistle and said to pick teams. Everyone else was picked first. He still remembers trying to pretend it didn’t matter while he felt like dying inside.
One client accepted extra work even though he does not want to work weekends because he wants to be liked and couldn’t say “no” because it would be embarrassing.
Another client spoke of shame seeping into her mind about the changes in her body since giving birth. She is happy to be a mother, but the changes in her body and the inner dialogue in her mind keep her in shame circles. The differences between how she experienced her body and how she feels now is shame.
Our inner conversations may say a variety of unhelpful things. For many of us, it is the voice of not being good enough. Or we might feel like an imposter. If our partner or boss says that we made a mistake, that may be a trigger for a shame attack.
Here are some clues to know when shame may be operating in your mind and body:
Thoughts: There’s something wrong with me and I don’t want anyone to know. Maybe I am an imposter and I need to hide.
Sensations: Feeling shy, face flushed, brain can freeze, difficulty having a conversation.
Reactions: Embarrassed, going blank, blaming others, using activity to numb, withdrawing. Not able to write or think clearly and not know why.
Coping with shame
If, instead of letting shame take over, we can be with and observe our shame, we can actually begin to learn something from it. We can begin to transform shame from a toxic disruptor to a useful informant, from a devastating foe to a useful ally.
Here are a few experiments to try when you notice shame coming up. Instead of putting yourself down, try one, then reflect on the results and write them down in a journal or in your notes app:
Be kind to yourself. Say something kind to yourself to ease the shame.
Pause and take a breath. Pausing for even a few seconds or one minute can offer a new perspective. How might this allow you to set a new boundary or reframe your story in a healthier way?
Set boundaries. Is there an extra shift you cannot take this week? Can you say stop or politely decline?
Name your feelings. Notice what didn’t feel good in your reaction. Can you talk about what you’re feeling in a different way?
Ground yourself. Tap your feet or feel the earth under your feet.
Get support. Talk to a friend who is kind and who can hear your feelings.
Spend time in nature. Take a few minutes to bathe in nature to refresh and replenish.
Understand that change happens slowly. Talk back to the shame inside yourself for a bit and find if the shame can be a little less toxic. Even a small shift or change can help you move forward rather than staying stuck.
Being friends with your shame can begin to change yourself and your life. When toxic shame lifts there can be access to creativity and new doors can open. The weight of heaviness can be put down and we can have new hope for the future. The reason we do this work is so others can find hope when there is shame and they can transform it and heal it.
Sheila Rubin, MA, LMFT, RDT/BCT, has been researching shame since she was five years old. Along with her husband and colleague, Bret Lyon, she is a founder and codirector of the Center for Healing Shame, and cocreator of the Healing Shame–Lyon/Rubin Method. Through their popular workshops, they have taught thousands of psychotherapists, coaches, and other helping professionals across the world to more effectively identify and work with shame. Sheila is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, a Registered Drama Therapist, and has taught at JFK University and CIIS, as well as being the eating disorder specialist at a hospital and directing Embodied Life Stories performances. For more, visit healingshame.com.
Bret Lyon, PhD, SEP has devoted almost two decades of his life to healing shame. Along with his wife and colleague, Sheila Rubin, he is a founder and codirector of the Center for Healing Shame, and cocreator of the Healing Shame–Lyon/Rubin Method. Through their popular workshops, they have taught thousands of psychotherapists, coaches, and other helping professionals across the world how to more effectively identify and work with shame. Bret holds doctorates in both psychology and drama and has taught at Tufts University, Pomona College, and the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, as well as writing and directing plays in regional theater and off-off Broadway. For more, visit healingshame.com.
Our understanding of the human nervous system has grown exponentially in recent years, thanks to astounding discoveries from neuroscience, Polyvagal Theory, trauma research, Attachment Theory, and other emerging fields. No longer do we see the functioning of the nervous system as an unconscious process outside of our control. Today, we know that you can actually befriend and work with your nervous system to self-regulate in the face of emotionally triggering situations, release unresolved trauma from the “stuck places” inside, and reclaim a life of integration and wholeness. Sounds True’s annual training, The Healing Trauma Program, was designed expressly for these purposes. In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with psychotherapist and lead teacher of the program Dr. Jeffrey Rutstein.
Tune in for an eye-opening conversation on: the connection between unhealed trauma and nervous system dysregulation; raising self-awareness around your personal triggers and conditioned responses; shifting from defensiveness to feelings of safety and belonging; chronic dysregulation; accurately discerning when you’re in danger; the vagus nerve, the ventral vagal response, and the “tend and befriend” zone where we can be fully present; the interplay of genetics and your upbringing in the formation of your “go-to nervous system states”; a nervous system approach to transforming self-blame and shame into self-compassion and worthiness; three pools of energy—hyperarousal, hypoarousal, and the Window of Tolerance; the empowering firsthand experience of changing your nervous system states; why there are no “bad” nervous system states; why being in a regulated state is so critical to healthy relationships; neuroception; simple, on-the-spot techniques (or “nervous system hacks”) you can use to self-regulate, from breathwork to gentle stretching and more; the shortcomings of talk therapy; co-regulation and the social engagement zone; the four key questions of the aspiring nervous system co-regulator; severe trauma and how “the state drives the story”; meditation practice, the true self, and the inner “hijacker”; and more.
Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.
The term Ayurveda is traditionally defined as “the science of life.” Physician and leading Ayurvedic teacher Dr. Avanti Kumar-Singh has another definition: she calls it “the knowledge of longevity.” In this podcast, join Tami Simon in conversation with Dr. Kumar-Singh about her new book, The Longevity Formula. Take a listen as they discuss the many ways that Ayurveda can support high-quality living, especially in your later years, by increasing cellular repair, decreasing inflammation, and keeping you connected with “your people and your purpose.”
Learn more about integrating Ayurvedic principles into Western medicine; lifespan versus health span; vitality, enthusiasm, and joy; forging stronger ties with your community and purpose; the causes and effects of cellular damage; the nine mechanisms of aging; bringing prana, or life-force energy, directly into your body through your natural surroundings and your diet; how all health and illness begins with the energetic body; what nourishment means in the Ayurvedic perspective; the Ayurvedic understanding of body tissues; good inflammation (yes, that’s a thing!); five Ayurvedic lifestyle interventions you can explore today; breathwork and the adage, “the inhale excites you and the exhale relaxes you”; giving and receiving love; the five doshas, or elements; and more.
Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.
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