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Getting Started: Finding Your Full Truth and Inner Fre...

Getting Started: Finding Your Full Truth and Inner Freedom - Zainab Salbi

Truth has a fullness to it. If we want to hold it in its essence and in its entirety, we need to acknowledge all aspects of it, even the ones we do not like. This is no easy task, but if our intention is to truly sit on the throne of our lives, then facing ourselves is essential.

When we acknowledge our shadows, we will face all the feelings that we’ve locked up inside: all the embarrassment, desire, instability, anger, or whatever has been hidden for so long. As uncomfortable as it is for a time, we also free ourselves—because then we really own ourselves. We grow in the process, becoming an example of what is possible when we take ownership of ourselves and our lives.

To get you started on your journey to your full truth and inner freedom, consider these questions for reflection taken from my new book, Freedom Is an Inside Job. I also offer you a short video on befriending your darkness.

  • How have you hurt people in your life? What part of your personality inflicts this hurt? Can you look at this part of yourself directly, without giving excuses or justifications for what you do?
  • What do you dislike the most in people’s characters? What does such dislike trigger in you?
  • What if instead of pointing the finger at what you don’t like in others, you pointed the finger at yourself? What might you see if you did that?
  • What would it take to transform your own shadow? Not destroy it, but transform it. What are the incentives to change?
  • Can you show compassion to your own shadow? Can you use it to ignite certain positive actions and not get stuck or entrenched in it?

Zainab Salbi - Sounds TrueZainab Salbi is a humanitarian, author, and media personality. She’s been featured by CNN, MSNBC, Oprah, People, The Guardian, HuffPost, and more. Salbi resides in New York City. For more, visit zainabsalbi.com.

Buy your copy of Freedom Is an Inside Job at your favorite bookseller!

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Miles Neale: Entering a Tibetan Buddhist Flight Simula...

Miles Neale is a prominent member of the current generation of Buddhist teachers, championing the emerging field of contemplative psychotherapy. With Sounds True, Miles has published Gradual Awakening: The Tibetan Buddhist Path of Becoming Fully Human. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon speaks with Miles about Lam Rim, the Tibetan Buddhist framework for moving into enlightened awakening step by measured step. They discuss the difference between gradually awakening and coming to enlightenment in a sudden burst, as well as the potential interplay between the two. Miles also leads Tami and the audience in a seven-step mentor bonding visualization that takes advantage of the mind’s capacity to create a “flight simulator” for felt experience. Finally, Miles and Tami talk about the need to re-embrace religion and ritual in order to transcend the “cinderblock civilization” of materialism and nihilism. (69 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
When Miles led us through a brief version of the mentor-bonding process that he teaches, I was surprised by who showed up in my mind’s eye. It was not a spiritual mentor, business mentor, or a psychological guide, but someone who has recently begun helping me become physically fit. This underscored for me how many different dimensions there are to mentorship, as well as how important it is to be utterly open to receiving help from a surprising source.

Zainab Salbi: Wielding Our Sword of Truth

Zainab Salbi is an author, humanitarian, and media commentator who founded the nonprofit organization Women for Women International when she was only 23 years old. With Sounds True, she has published the book Freedom Is an Inside Job: Owning Our Darkness and Our Light to Heal Ourselves and the World. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Zainab discuss what it means to be an agent of social change while also navigating the everyday journey of being human. They talk about why it’s necessary to let go of what no longer works in our lives in order to embrace our most deeply held truths. As an Iraqi-American, Zainab speaks on engaging with people whose values oppose ours—especially those who currently oppose Muslim immigration to the United States. Finally, Zainab and Tami talk about the healing power of making amends and what “freedom” really means. (83 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
Zainab teaches how we can befriend people who hold opposing views not through debate, but through embrace and a strong, open stance that is curious about the other person’s underlying needs and emotions. I believe this skill—truly understanding people who disagree with us and feel “other”—is one of the most important skills we need to be peacemakers and bringers of love in all of our interactions.

Paul Hawken: A Regenerative World

Paul Hawken is an author, entrepreneur, and environmentalist whose books include Natural Capitalism, The Ecology of Commerce, and the New York Times bestselling Drawdown. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon speaks with Paul about the spiritual origins of his lifelong devotion to the natural environment. They talk about Project Drawdown—Paul’s far-reaching plan to reverse global warming—and the fact that climate change is an alarm bell telling humanity it needs to transform itself. Paul explains that dealing successfully with climate change won’t just involve phasing out fossil fuels, but also reorganizing the systems of labor, culture, and economics that led us to this point. Finally, Paul and Tami discuss why life regenerates life and how we as a species can rise to the challenge of our present crises. (73 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
Most of the time, when I hear people talk about climate change, I feel some combination of fear, helplessness, and resignation. Listening to Paul Hawken, I felt activated and turned on. As he says, it’s not about “game over” for the human race, but “game on” . . . and how this is a time when we are called to step forward into our greatest human capacities and possibilities. Paul Hawken transmits the beauty, flow, and regenerative power of the natural world in a way that is contagious. When the interview was over, I felt like everything around me was in a shimmering fluid state, in unstoppable regenerative flow.

Rhonda Magee: We Are Embodied and Embedded: Bringing M...

Rhonda Magee is a law professor at the University of San Francisco, a longtime mindfulness teacher, and a fellow of the Mind & Life Institute. Rhonda is a featured presenter in Sounds True’s Waking Up in the World—a 10-day online event showcasing prominent voices who embody the meeting between social action and spiritual exploration. This special episode of Insights at the Edge is drawn from a previous presentation given by Rhonda as part of our Mindfulness Monthly subscription program. Here she explores how mindfulness practice can be used to uncover our biases and help us understand any privilege we carry in our interactions with others. Rhonda encourages us to fully consider how aspects such as race, gender, and economic background have come to shape our perception of the world. Finally, Rhonda leads us in a guided meditation to inquire deeply into how our environments have guided us to this moment in our lives. (63 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
We often hear how mindfulness can help us discover our common humanity. Here, law professor Rhonda Magee helps us embrace what is unique about each of us: our embodied experience as a particular person with a specific human inheritance, residing in a particular place, with a particular position, skin color, gender, and sexual orientation. We are applying mindfulness to what makes us different. And what a critical skill this is if we are going to learn to take a different person’s position and work together to bring mindfulness to what Rhonda calls “the cutting edge of mindfulness”—shifting our institutions and social structures to reflect our deepest values.

Susan David: Emotional Agility

Susan David is a psychologist teaching at Harvard Medical School, cofounder of the Institute of Coaching at McLean Hospital, and the bestselling author of Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon talks with Susan about modern society’s attitudes toward emotion—specifically our tendency to label certain feelings as good or bad, and the dysfunctional behaviors that arise as a result. Susan explains that a much healthier approach is to identify “bad” emotions as “tough” or “difficult,” allowing us to examine them in a granular way that helps in processing them. Tami and Susan discuss how this informed method of dealing with emotions can be taught to children, which is especially important for learning not to bottle or brood upon unpleasant feelings. Finally, Susan draws upon a story from her adolescence to illustrate why emotional honesty is paramount for living a fulfilled life and why forced positivity never works out in the long run. (66 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway: I loved hearing from a Harvard professor that “chasing happiness just doesn’t work.” It certainly hasn’t worked for me. Instead, she teaches how rewarding it can be to orient ourselves towards fulfillment and living a life that is meaningful. And then in some strange, unexpected way, happiness dawns. My two favorite quotes from this interview are: “Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life,” and “Life’s beauty is inseparable from its fragility.”

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