When we learn to practice these five skills, we strengthen our resilience in exactly the way the brain learns best—small experiences repeated many times. We can develop new ways to respond to pressures and tragedies quickly, adaptively, effectively.
Bestselling poet Maggie Smith has a gift for embracing the complexity of our human experience—and for writing about it with piercing intensity, clarity, and beauty. In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Maggie about her approach to her craft and to life, and how writing can serve as a pathway to self-discovery and release.
Featuring a reading of the beloved poem “Good Bones,” this insightful episode of Insights at the Edge explores metaphor and life in sensory experience; poetic memoir; Maggie’s “drill-down” exercise; entering the territory of our pain; balancing a creative life and domestic responsibilities; the notion of “containing multitudes”; being an integrated, whole person; intuition and the deep knowing of what is brave, real, and true; sitting with the splinters (instead of sanding them down); allowing “full wingspan” for both individuals in a relationship; endurance versus closure; forgiveness versus acceptance; taking a bird’s-eye view of our experiences; making life more beautiful for everyone; and more.
Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.
The Author
Sarah Jane Hinder is a yoga and mindfulness teacher and the illustrator of several bestselling children’s picture books, including Good Night Yoga and Good Morning Yoga. She is also the author and illustrator of Hello, Sun! and the bestselling yoga board book series that includes Yoga Bug, Yoga Bear, Yoga Whale, and Yoga Bunny for children. Sarah lives in Manchester, England. For more information, visit sarahjanehinder.com.
The Book
Whimsical and playful, Hello, Moon! is both a celebration of the night sky and an introduction to the joys of yoga, teaching children ages 4–8 to breathe, stretch, and relax through yoga poses to wind down at the end of the day.
What was your favorite book as a child?
Alice in Wonderland, written by Lewis Carroll and illustrated by John Tenniel, has to be my favorite book as a child. I loved how the White Rabbit was always late, the hilarious Mad Hatter’s tea party, and how Alice would grow and shrink by eating the Caterpillar’s toadstool.
I loved that Alice was brave and strong, overcoming her fears and solving problems by herself. She meets so many wonderful creatures throughout her imaginative and fantastical journey. I used to dream about meeting the Caterpillar and the Cheshire Cat and always wanted to save the Dormouse from the teapot. I love a story where the character grows (literally) and learns from her experiences.
Send us a photo of you and your pet, and let us know if your pet had any role in helping you write your book!
I have two Chihuahuas, who are my artist’s assistants, Paul and Alice. They are always by my side, in front of my face, or standing on my artwork or laptop.
Paul has actually been a co-illustrator on one of my book covers, Good Night Yoga.
When my art was propped against the wall, Paul decided to put his paw in my paint palette. He then trotted over to my illustration and pawed paint over it. He likes to get involved, much to my dismay! They also both love to join me during Savasana by standing on my chest and giving me lots of kisses.
Has your book taken on a new meaning in the world’s current circumstances? Is there anything you would have included in your book if you were writing it now?
There has been more awareness of the importance of mental health in children since the pandemic. Social connection is very important, especially in early childhood, yet children are being isolated from one another. Avoiding each other through fear greatly increases stress in a child.
Yoga and mindfulness can help children develop connections within themselves, using their mind, body, and breath to reduce levels of stress and anxiety.
Hello, Moon! delivers a gentle sequence of yoga poses, moon salutations, to calm and soothe the body before bedtime, a time when fears can appear.
When writing Hello, Moon!, I included a Moon Meditation; however, there wasn’t enough room within the 32 pages of a picture book to include it. I will be adding this as a free resource on my website as a bedtime companion to the picture book.
Learn More
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Tami Simon speaks with Dr. Jeffrey Thompson, one of the foremost researchers studying sound and its effect on the brain and body. Based on his discoveries of how specific frequency patterns can create health benefits, Dr. Thompson has created dozens of popular brainwave entrainment audio programs, including Brainwave Suite, Alpha Relaxation System, and Delta Sleep System. In this episode, Tami speaks with Dr. Thompson about the science behind brainwave entrainment and how it can affect our physiology, the discovery of the gamma brainwave state that occurs during periods of deep meditation, and the power of what Dr. Thompson calls primordial sounds. (75 minutes)
Tami Simon speaks with Terry Tempest Williams, a writer, naturalist, environmental activist, and author of several books including Finding Beauty in a Broken World and an original audio adaptation of the book, published by Sounds True. In this interview, Terry discusses her creative process as a writer and how she has been able to find beauty in a broken world. (47 minutes)
It’s no surprise that the well-worn aphorism “It takes a village to raise a child” has resonated with many parents, along with another ancient proverb thought to have originated in Africa, “If you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go together.” Why do these now-clichéd old sayings ring true?
Because being a parent is lonely sometimes, and these sayings evoke a felt sense of connection and interconnection for which many parents long.
It’s the warm, fuzzy feeling that bubbles up at children’s holiday concerts, sporting events, and other neighborhood programs. It’s an understanding from the inside out that being a parent is as much about the community as it is about our children. It speaks to a holistic perspective that challenges the narrow view that we are independent, self-contained individuals and instead elevates a mindset that recognizes the many ways we are dependent and connected.
When we tap into this view, we remember that the way we relate to our children ripples out to touch their friends, teammates, classmates, teachers, coaches, doctors, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and on and on and on. Remembering this ripple effect can be a powerful antidote to the stress, strain, and even the doldrums of a busy parent’s life.
Here are five themes that help parents connect with interconnection.
A Ripple Effect
When their caregivers are so tired, stressed-out, afraid, or frustrated that they habitually speak and act impulsively without thinking through the consequences, it’s tough for children to imagine a community of relaxed, reflective adults who relate to one another thoughtfully, collaboratively, and with kindness.
Similarly, when kids live in communities where the prevailing mindset is that resources are scarce and there’s not enough to go around (like many of us do), it’s tough for them to imagine a world where collaboration and altruism, fueled by an understanding that achievement is not a zero-sum game, are woven into the culture. Switching the lens through which kids and parents view the world from a me-first orientation to a generous one can be an uphill battle, but it’s a struggle that can be won. How? By remembering the ripple effect made by even small acts of kindness and collaboration.
Takeaway: Today, watch for places that you’re starting a ripple effect. How does that make you feel?
Ordinary Magic
“The highest to which man can attain,” wrote Goethe, “is wonder,” but when busy parents are pulled in many directions at once, it’s easy to lose sight of the wonder in every moment. If you pause and look closely at chores and workaday obligations that feel relentless, you’ll notice that even what seems to be a fixed routine is anything but solid and predictable.
By bringing a sense of wonder and mystery to the everyday occurrences that make up family life (this flower, her smile, his laugh, that traffic jam), what once seemed like ordinary occurrences become nuanced, extraordinary ones. Okay, maybe not the traffic jam.
Takeaway: Today, make time and space for the “ordinary magic” of everyday experience.
Meet Everything with Love
If you’re anything like me, your knee-jerk reaction to a crazy to-do list and an over-crowded schedule is to bear down and muscle through. There’s an alternative, though. When you react to being busy by pausing rather than speeding up, you’re brought back to what’s happening in the moment.
If you relax rather than power through, you interrupt your body’s fight or flight response that releases adrenaline and activates the wing of your nervous system that promotes ease and calm instead. A few breaths later, you’ll be able to see what’s happening within and around you more clearly, set priorities more confidently, and return to what you were doing in a more balanced way.
Now you’re ready for what I think is the most radical piece of the mindful worldview. You’re ready to meet whatever comes your way with love—a practice I learned from the remarkable meditation teacher Joseph Goldstein. Can you think of a more apt intention for parents?
Takeaway: Test drive this approach the next time you find yourself in a conversation with someone who is challenging. See what happens if you meet what they say with love, even if you don’t feel it.
Don’t Expect Applause
It’s not a great idea to expect something in return when helping others; it’s better to do what needs to be done for its own sake. That’s what it looks like to prioritize motivation over results. Prioritizing motivation doesn’t mean ignoring outcomes, though. It just means remembering that there will always be things outside your control.
So how do busy parents with long to-do lists acknowledge uncertainty without becoming overwhelmed? By staying present in the moment and focusing on the goodness of what you’re doing instead of the results.
Takeaway: The next time you’re faced with a job that seems overwhelming, break it down into small tasks. Take-on one job at a time, and focus on the goodness of the task that you’re doing instead of the result. See what happens.
You’re basically good (seriously, you are).
Parents often hold themselves to unrealistically high standards because they want the best for their families. Being hard on yourself can backfire though, because the more preoccupied you become, thinking about where you didn’t measure up, the less bandwidth you have to remember the places where you did.
What if, instead of being hard on yourself, every time you feel mildly dissatisfied you view that dissatisfaction as a reflection of your basic goodness? Let’s say you’re frustrated and cranky because your children aren’t getting along. What if, rather than beating yourself up for being impatient, you view that frustration as a manifestation of a deep desire for your kids relate to one another happily and with ease? In other words, you see frustration as an expression of your basic goodness.
Takeaway: If feelings of dissatisfaction or impatience bubble up today, see if you can view them as an expression of your basic goodness—your hope that everyone is healthy, happy, safe, and living with ease.
Susan Kaiser Greenland is a mindfulness teacher and founder of the Inner Kids Foundation (along with her husband, author Seth Greenland), a not-for-profit organization that taught secular mindfulness and community-based programs from 2001 to 2009. She has researched the impact of mindfulness in education, childcare, and family health at UCLA, and her research has been published in the Journal of Applied School Psychology. Susan’s work has appeared in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Chicago Tribune, the Washington Post, USA Today, Real Simple, HuffPost, and Parents Magazine. She currently works in the United States and abroad as an author, public speaker, and internationally recognized educator on the subject of sharing secular mindfulness and meditation with children and families.
For more, visit susankaisergreenland.com.
For anyone who wants to bring mindfulness into their family life, Susan Kaiser Greenland, a pioneer in bringing mindfulness to children and families, presents easy-to-learn practices created to help busy parents fit mindfulness into their daily routine. Mindful Parent, Mindful Child is structured as an “audio journey” for daily use, offering 30 potent practices that will teach the essentials of mindful awareness, compassion, self-regulation, stress relief, and much more in just ten minutes a day.
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