You searched for Sounds True - Page 179 of 208

blog

Winter’s Reminder to Slow Down and Sink into Deep Re...

Jacqueline Suskin — January 4, 2024

My constant reminder to myself all winter is to not push too hard. The essence of the season reminds me that I don’t have to document every aha moment that happens in these cold, quiet months. I don’t have to share every discovery or turn every insight into a poem. In the winter, I’m much more inclined to commune with the Divine and let those conversations remain private. This is the influence of winter, the way it teaches me to shift from an overly productive participant’s pace into a person with a battery that needs to plug in and recharge gradually in order to rise up refreshed for the act of creation.

Rest isn’t easy for us, and we have to be intentional about it. How will you ensure that rest is a central part of your winter schedule? A lot can be accomplished in these sleepy months of contemplation, but if you position rest as the central focus of your routine, you’ll emerge from this season with more endurance for the working days ahead of you.

What does an ideal period of rest look like for you?

Unwinding looks different for everyone, and you’ll need to spend some time making a list of ways you can actualize rest in your daily winter life.

Maybe once a week you wake up and immediately take a hot bath. Maybe you watch a movie in the middle of the day. Maybe you get under your electric blanket and read a book for an hour after lunch. Resting usually requires doing (or not doing) something that will break your routine of constant output. How can you convince yourself to pause and be leisurely?

You’ll have to choose activities that will force you to slow down. You’ll have to remind yourself that resting will expand your creative practice in the long run, even if it seems like the opposite is happening in the moment. Experiment with what works best for you.

Prompts from the Planet

What do plants and other animals do in the winter?

They go dormant. Seeds wait, inactive in the dark soil or stored away, safe and dry.

They harden, keep warm, and get slow. Some stop growing. Others sleep and dream.

Below ground, everything works anew, protective and focused on survival.

The plant world pauses its creation and changes its approach, waiting for the sun to return.

Remember, we are part of the same cycle.

Remember to ask yourself: What is the natural world up to right now? How does it include me?

This is an adapted excerpt from A Year in Practice: Seasonal Rituals and Prompts to Awaken Cycles of Creative Expression by Jacqueline Suskin.

podcast

Post Views: 4,452

Clay Routledge: The Surprising Powers of Nostalgia

Clay Routledge — December 12, 2023

Can relishing the past help us create a better future? If we want to move ahead, how does going back support us? Could it be that thinking about the past is inseparable from thinking about the future? These are the questions Dr. Clay Routledge explores in his new book, Past Forward.

In this fascinating and very cool podcast, Tami Simon and Clay consider how a walk down memory lane can lead you to a brighter tomorrow, discussing: agency, action, and the power of a “meaning mindset”; building a culture of agency; existential psychology; the subjective experience of time and the concept of “temporal consciousness”; why it’s important to savor the moment; the characteristics of nostalgia; working with difficult or bittersweet memories; how creativity is facilitated by a sense of security; journaling, playlists, scrapbooks, cooking, and other practical approaches to cultivate nostalgia and its benefits; the “reminiscence bump” and how nostalgia helps us feel younger; becoming our true selves; nostalgia around objects and personal possessions; and more.

podcast

Post Views: 4,793

Katie Horwitch: Reimagining Being Positive and Fearles...

Katie Horwitch — October 5, 2023

Shifting out of negative self-talk isn’t easy. Sugar-coating, “sending love and light,” faking-it-till-we-make-it, and other forms of false positivity can do more harm than good. In her book, Want Your Self: Shift Your Self-Talk and Unearth the Strength in Who You Were All Along, activist and mindset coach Katie Horwitch brings readers a practical guide for becoming fluent in an inner language for loving who you are while growing into the person you were meant to become.

In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Horwitch about her empowering approach to living with greater self-acceptance, integrity, and authenticity, discussing confidence versus vanity; fitting in versus belonging; the risks of positive thinking; getting to the core of the Self; proactive positivity; how shifting self-talk leads to cultural, systemic transformation; focusing on priorities, cultivating trust and other tools to stop negative feedback loops; the practice of using anchor words; the fear versus faith exercise; being your true self “out loud”; integrity as the alignment of your intention and your impact; stepping up to the plate of our life; and more.

podcast

Post Views: 3,666

Jamie Della: Crafting a Wise and Magickal Life

Jamie Della — September 28, 2023

Mystery and misunderstanding surround the practice of magick and witchcraft. In the decades since she chose to publicly “come out of the broom closet,” author, priestess, healer, and Xicana witch Jamie Della has made it her mission to help others activate their divine intuition and creativity. In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Jamie about her new book, A Box of Magick, written to give readers both her personal mentorship and that of her own mentor, the late Elder Wiccan High Priestess Connie DeMasters.

Tune in for a perspective-shifting conversation about: The philosophy and lifestyle known as witchcraft; animism and our interconnection with all things; why you are always your own best teacher; “the nameless art;” Wicca as the practice of shaping energy; the four steps of ethical spellcasting; keeping the faith; answering a call of the wild within; shadow work and healing our parental relationships; bringing in ritual elements to support transformation; using magick for intergenerational healing; invoking a mentor; a guided blessing for grounding and stability at this time; and more.

blog

Post Views: 3,104

Turn your understanding of meditation inside out and u...

Andrew Holecek — June 26, 2023

Meditation has found a home in the West. Countless scientific studies tout its benefits, and a multitude of students proclaim its life-changing value. I am one of those students. For over forty-five years I have practiced this ancient art, and I continue to reap its remarkable rewards. While I remain a follower of many wisdom traditions, and believe that no one has a patent on truth, thirty years ago I took refuge in Buddhism. The adage “Chase two rabbits; catch none” points out the necessity of commitment, and the dangers of spreading yourself too thin.

My passion for meditation led me into the traditional Tibetan three-year retreat, where I became a monk with robes and a shaved head, meditating fourteen hours a day in a remote monastery. I even slept sitting up in meditation posture, practicing the nocturnal meditations of dream and sleep yoga. Three-year retreat is like a meditation university, providing the opportunity to practice dozens of meditations in the most nurturing environment. It remains the most transformative experience of my life.

Of the many practices I was introduced to in retreat, one meditation stands out: the quirky, intense, multifaceted, and revolutionary practice of reverse meditation. I learned these practices within the context of Mahāmudrā (Sanskrit for “great seal”), a lofty tradition in Tibetan Buddhism that explores the nature of the mind. This was over twenty years ago, and since then these radical meditations have become a cornerstone of my spiritual path.

They’re called “reverse” meditation for a number of reasons. First, these practices are the opposite, or reverse, of what many of us associate with meditation. Most people think that meditation is about feeling good, getting “Zen,” or otherwise chilling out. But this is just one small aspect of meditation. Complete meditation is not about feeling good—it’s about getting real. And getting real requires dealing with the reality of difficult situations.

Second, these unique meditations are designed to reverse our relationship to unwanted experiences, which means going directly into them instead of avoiding them. In so doing we can discover the basic goodness of whatever arises, which is deeper than interpretative goodness. Basic goodness refers to the ineffable “suchness, isness, thatness” of whatever occurs—good or bad.

If we capitulate to our usual avoidance strategies, we push the acute, conscious psychological discomfort of avoidance into becoming a chronic, unconscious mental cramp. The discomfort is still there, but now it’s buried deep in our body-mind matrix, where it works backstage to dictate much of our onstage life. The rejected experience then manifests symptomatically—it becomes an undiagnosed reflection of an underlying discord that expresses itself in virtually everything we do. Our actions then become evasion tactics—reactivity, psychological duress, physical illness, and all manner of unskillful responses to the challenges of life—as we try to skirt these buried, uncomfortable feelings.

The reverse meditations give us the opportunity to relate to our mind instead of from it—and also to establish a relationship to our evasion tactics, which otherwise become obstacles that act like scar tissue to sequester the unwanted experience from consciousness. Relating from our mind, from our reactivity, is no relationship at all. In place of conscious relationship, we respond with knee-jerk reflexes to difficult experience, a reactivity that kicks us out of our feeling body and into our thinking head, and into unnecessary suffering. Instead of dealing authentically with the challenging somatic sensation, we leap into inauthentic conceptual proliferation (confabulating and catastrophizing) to buffer ourselves from the discomfort of our feelings. We run from the honest pain and real news that come with being human, and into dishonest commentary and fake news. The truth is that many of the worst things in our life are things that never really “happened”!

Third, the reverse meditations upend our sense of meditation altogether. They represent a revolution in spiritual practice that turns our understanding of meditation inside out and upside down, and therefore radically expand our practice. Situations that were once antithetical to meditation now become our meditation. Obstacles that previously obstructed our spiritual path now become our path. This means that everything becomes our meditation. Nothing is forbidden. We can enter lifetime retreat in the midst of ordinary life.

Excerpted from Reverse Meditation: How to Use Your Pain and Most Difficult Emotions as the Doorway to Inner Freedom by Andrew Holecek.

blog

Post Views: 1,881

A Compassionate Approach to Recognizing Trauma Bonding

Jeffrey Rutstein — January 10, 2023

The theory of attachment styles became popularized in the last 15 years; now trauma is (finally) getting recognition from the mainstream. But most of us aren’t yet clear about the very deep connection that exists between trauma and certain attachment styles. This is where the concept of “trauma bonding” comes into play.

What is trauma bonding?

Trauma bonding happens when we get attached to someone who is often neglectful or abusive (physically, emotionally, or psychologically), but is also occasionally kind. When we’re attached to someone like this, we typically explain away their bad behavior, claiming “they had a hard day” or “it was my fault they got mad at me.” Rationalization offers us a semblance of protection from seeing the reality of the danger and inequality in the relationship.

It’s common to form a trauma bonding pattern when one of our parents or partners is erratic, abusive, or absent. But often the template of trauma bonding gets applied to many of our relationships.

Signs You Have a Trauma Bond

If you’re in a trauma bond relationship right now, you may make dramatic or sudden life changes or even great sacrifices for the sake of the relationship to the detriment of outside friendships, family, and your autonomy.

Even if the original, harmful relationship is now a thing of the past (e.g., you moved out, you broke up with the manipulative partner, or your former abuser has died), the trauma bonding pattern may remain embedded until you learn how to consciously uproot it.

Signs this trauma bonding template is still present can include:

Emotionally caretaking others while your own needs and desires are swept under the rug
Acting as if you continually need to prove your worth to others (and yourself)
Avoiding being authentic or open because it feels like too great a risk
Feeling frustrated, exhausted, hypervigilant, or unsupported in relationships due to perceiving pressure coming from others
A pattern of feeling disempowered around coworkers, a spouse, or family members

What Causes Trauma Bonding?

When we experience stress and feel (consciously or unconsciously) we’re in danger, our sympathetic nervous system activates the “fight or flight” response. As long as that circuitry is activated, we’re not able to plan for the future or assess risks very clearly; our nervous system gets locked in survival mode to get through the stress. In other words, it’s not your fault that you can’t see what’s going on.

The challenge is heightened because of the intermittent reinforcement that characterizes trauma bonds: we receive occasional comfort or love in the relationship, which is sprinkled on top of the typical abuse or neglect. Like other forms of intermittent reinforcement, it’s an addictive combination to be exposed to, and one that hampers our ability to understand we’re being mistreated.

Because we focus so intently on the positive reinforcement we experience from time to time with our abuser, we contort ourselves psychologically to try to get the love as often as we can. Once this pattern is established, it is naturally hard to stop engaging it—again, because of the way our nervous system developed. Getting outside support to stop the cycle is an act of strength and wisdom.

Should You Break a Trauma Bond?

If you’re in clear and real danger, it is most important to find a way to safely remove yourself from harm. Over the longer term, the best approach is learning to create healthy relational boundaries so as not to form or reform trauma bonds.

Once you start to become aware of the trauma bonding pattern operating in you, you can recognize and address the behaviors it causes. You can uncover and listen to your buried needs and wants, and reclaim your personal power and freedom. Doing this can help you shift your nervous system out of past trauma bonding tendencies and toward new possibilities, including nurturing mutual relationships with people who are interested in your happiness and will support your thriving.

To find out more about healing traumas (including trauma bonding), please check out The Healing Trauma Program, hosted by Jeffrey Rutstein, PsyD, CHT.

Search Results for: Sounds True – Page 179

Winter’s Reminder to Slow Down and Sink into Deep Re...

A Year in Practice

Clay Routledge: The Surprising Powers of Nostalgia

Katie Horwitch: Reimagining Being Positive and Fearles...

Jamie Della: Crafting a Wise and Magickal Life

Turn your understanding of meditation inside out and u...

A Compassionate Approach to Recognizing Trauma Bonding

What is trauma bonding?

Signs You Have a Trauma Bond

What Causes Trauma Bonding?

Should You Break a Trauma Bond?

Categories

Menu

Listen to Sounds True playlists on

Connect With Us