The Forgiveness Challenge: Shifting from Narrow Mind to Spacious Mind

December 25, 2013

The Forgiveness Challenge: Shifting from Narrow Mind to Spacious Mind

Rabbi Rami Shapiro December 25, 2013

Tami Simon speaks with Rabbi Rami Shapiro, the co-director of the One River Wisdom School. Rabbi Rami writes the column “Roadside Assistance for the Spiritual Traveler” for Spirituality & Health magazine, and hosts the How to Be a Holy Rascal show on Unity Online Radio. With Sounds True, he has created The Forgiveness Challenge, a three-week online intensive course on radical acceptance. In this episode, Tami speaks with Rabbi Rami about dealing with situations where we find it challenging to forgive, the importance of asking others to forgive us, and how looking deeply into the areas of life that require forgiveness can illuminate meaning in our lives. (71 minutes)

Rabbi Rami Shapiro is an award winning author of over two dozen nonfiction books, whose poems and short stories have been anthologized in over a dozen volumes, and whose prayers are used in prayer books around the world. Rami received rabbinical ordination from the Hebrew Union College–Jewish Institute of Religion, and holds a PH.D. in religion from Union Graduate School. A congregational rabbi for 20 years, Rabbi Rami is currently Adjunct Professor of Religious Studies at Middle Tennessee State University where he also directs The Writer’s Loft, MTSU’s creative writing program, and co–director of One River Wisdom School, a training program in the Perennial Philosophy.In addition to writing books, Rami writes a regular column for Spirituality and Health magazine called Roadside Assistance for the Spiritual Traveler. He can be reached via his website, rabbirami.com.

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Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.

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Rabbi Rami Shapiro is an award-winning author, teacher, and former congregational rabbi whose written prayers are used in books around the world. With Sounds True, he has published the spoken-word offering How to be a Holy Rascal and the forthcoming book Holy Rascals: Advice for Spiritual Revolutionaries. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Rami and Tami Simon talk about the concept of the “holy rascal” and just what it takes to become one. Rami speaks on his background as a rabbi and how he came to a practice of “nondual Judaism.” Tami and Rami also discuss his encounters with God as a mother figure, and how these mystical experiences led to a burning away of his clinging tendencies. Finally, Rami underlines the importance of ecstatic experiences and why holy rascals are needed now more than ever. (68 minutes)

The Forgiveness Challenge: Shifting from Narrow Mind t...

Tami Simon speaks with Rabbi Rami Shapiro, the co-director of the One River Wisdom School. Rabbi Rami writes the column “Roadside Assistance for the Spiritual Traveler” for Spirituality & Health magazine, and hosts the How to Be a Holy Rascal show on Unity Online Radio. With Sounds True, he has created The Forgiveness Challenge, a three-week online intensive course on radical acceptance. In this episode, Tami speaks with Rabbi Rami about dealing with situations where we find it challenging to forgive, the importance of asking others to forgive us, and how looking deeply into the areas of life that require forgiveness can illuminate meaning in our lives. (71 minutes)

The Forgiveness Challenge – with Rabbi Rami Shap...

Friends, we’re happy to announce a new online program with Rabbi Rami Shapiro, entitled The Forgiveness Challenge: 21 Days of Radical Acceptance. We’re taking registrations now and the course will begin officially on January 29, 2014. Once the course becomes available in January, you will be able to work through it at your own pace. When you register for the the course, you will also receive a free copy of Rabbi Rami’s ebook Forgiveness.

We’ve all been taught that forgiveness is an integral part of our spiritual lives. We understand that forgiveness enables us to let go of pain and anger, heal our relationships, and grow in compassion and humility. But what is forgiveness, really? And why does it often seem difficult, if not impossible, to achieve?

The Forgiveness Challenge offers you a 21-day training program in what Rabbi Rami calls “Self-awakening”—or realizing directly that you are at once both a worldly self and a divine Self that transcends time and space. For the next three weeks, you will experience a variety of contemplative practices and psycho-spiritual exercises that work five core dimensions of being: body, heart, mind, soul, and spirit. Each endeavor is designed “to awaken the narrow to the spacious” and allow the acceptance of the experiences of self in the larger context of Self.

We’re looking forward to seeing you all online in January! Learn more and register here.

forgivenesschallenge

 

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Take Your Inner Child on Playdates

Have you ever been ice-skating before? It sounds like a fun winter activity (especially if you enjoy the cold, like I do), but it can be frustrating and even downright scary if you’re new to it.

Picture this: I took my nephew ice-skating for the first time, full of excitement to see him experience some joy. At twelve years of age, he was already taller than me and had size thirteen feet thanks to his six-foot-eight-inch-tall dad (my brother). The biggest rental skates they had came with worn-out laces rather than the secure plastic bindings all of the other skates had. I could see that they were a little loose around the ankle, but we tied them as best we could and hit the ice.

If you’ve ever seen a newborn deer figuring out how to walk for the first time, you can picture my nephew’s first time on ice skates. His ankles kept knocking in, and he was reaching to hold onto anything for dear life as he wobbled around the perimeter of the rink. It was difficult to watch, not because it was embarrassing, but because I know how hard he is on himself when he’s not immediately good at new things. I wanted to see him having fun, and instead I saw him frustrated and discouraged as all he could do was attempt to remain vertical.

I figured it couldn’t get worse, so I suggested that we trade in his skates for a smaller pair with the more secure plastic buckles to see if that made any difference. He went along with it, probably just to humor me, and we stuffed his feet into some size twelves and made sure his ankle support was good as could be. When I tell you it was a night and day difference, I’m not exaggerating. Suddenly he was speeding around the ice like a pro, lapping past me and his sisters with the biggest smile on his face. He circled the rink over and over again; as his confidence grew, so did his joy, and he even began to try tricks and spins. All he had needed was one little adjustment to his foundation, and he suddenly felt safe enough to have fun.

Here’s the thing: most of us go around in our lives on rickety old skates with worn-out laces. When your only focus is doing your best to remain upright, there’s not much room for joy or play. The big shame in that is that play often is the medicine we most need.

In my experience, the crux of inner child work is reconnecting to the part of you who knows how to play. Sometimes you may first need to make some adjustments that allow you to feel safe enough to play, like practicing nervous system regulation and self-soothing. Once you’ve done that, though, your goal is to invite in as much play as possible. And not adult versions of play that are really just a facade for dissociative behaviors, but real, childlike wonder.

Invite in curiosity and awe and silliness and uninhibited joy. Start by returning to the things you loved to do when you were a kid. Maybe that means setting aside time each weekend for arts and crafts. Maybe it means participating in physical activities that feel like play, such as dancing, swimming, sports, or jumping on a trampoline. Maybe it just means giving yourself permission to skip while you walk or sing while you drive.

The point is, when you bring those younger versions of you into your present-day life, you not only have more fun, but you also experience more healing. We were never meant to lose touch with our inner child. Yes, it’s important to learn how to be self-sufficient and responsible, and aging is inevitable. But it’s equally important not to take yourself too seriously along the way.

Try This

Your homework is to set regular playdates with your inner child. Do things that sound like fun, even if they don’t make logical sense. Allow yourself to be as carefree and openhearted as possible, without judging the things that bring you joy. The sillier it feels, the more on point you likely are. Here are some examples to consider:

  • Take an afternoon off of work and go to an amusement park.
  • Schedule an evening of watching your favorite childhood movies.
  • Spend the weekend out in nature, frolicking with your imagination.
  • Try something brand new, like rock climbing or ice-skating, to tap into that feeling of beginner’s mind.

Play is an important part of our overall well-being. Consistently making time to get into that creative flow state will help you deepen your relationship with your inner child . . . and your adult self. I suggest checking in at least once per month, if not weekly, to see where you can fit more play into your life.

Excerpted from Choose Your Self: How to Embrace Being Single, Heal Core Wounds, and Build a Life You Love.

Megan Sherer


Megan Sherer is a certified somatic therapist and licensed hypnotherapist whose mission is to help others build healthy and fulfilling relationships, starting with self. She hosts the Well, Then podcast and founded the women’s therapy app The Self Care Space. For more, visit megansherer.com.

Choose Your Self

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Helping Kids Feel Confident in the Spotlight

Dear Sounds True friends,

Have you ever been in the spotlight?
The excitement, the lights, and…
…ALL EYES ON YOU (Gulp!)

While some athletes, speakers, and performers bask in the glow, it can be scary for most others. I happen to be one of these “others,” complete with sweaty palms, a racing heart, and a blank mind!

These big feelings inspired me to write All Eyes on You, a story that helps kids overcome performance anxiety when they find themselves the center of attention, such as on stage, in a classroom, or on the baseball field.

I share tried-and-true tips for dealing with these moments (such as breathing exercises and counting to slow down your racing heart) while also having fun (like picturing the audience in their underwear) to help boost confidence and be present in the moment.

It also makes an excellent tool for helping others calm the butterfly stampede in their stomachs and feel a sense of camaraderie that they are not alone in their stage fright.

So when the stage calls (or the front of the classroom or home plate), take a deep breath and give these tips a try. You just might surprise yourself—and those around you!

Break a leg,

Susi Schaefer
Author & Illustrator

P.S. I invite you to download free coloring sheets from the book to also enjoy with the little ones in your life!

Susi Schaefer

Susi Schaefer trained as a classical glass painter in Austria before moving to the United States and studying graphic design. She is the illustrator of Zoo Zen and Good Morning, I Love You, Violet! as well as the author-illustrator of other picture books for children. For more, visit susischaefer.com.

A Message of Gratitude

Dear Sounds True friend,

At this time of thanks-giving, I want to thank you, a beloved member of our extended Sounds True community of listeners, readers, authors, and learners worldwide.

Thank you for your interest and willingness to be an explorer of your inner world.

Thank you for your perseverance, your willingness to be here, with all of life’s great joys and terrible griefs and sorrows. Thank you for being ”on the journey,” with all of the ways life breaks open our hearts and asks us to expand and hold a larger space of love.

Thank you for your courage to be you, beloved and singular, the you that carries a unique gift, some special look, a cry and a laugh never heard before, a contribution we need. Thank you for being yourself and extending yourself to others, even in small ways, which often turn out to be huge.

My own prayer this Thanksgiving is to remain steadfast and true. Please know that here at Sounds True we remain so—and we love doing so in connection with you. We are here because you are here. This thanks-giving, I bow to the strength and goodness of our human hearts.

With you on the journey,

Tami

P.S. Here is a thanks-giving offering, a classic poem from Mary Oliver:

Praying

It doesn’t have to be
the blue iris, it could be 
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few 
small stones; just 
pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don’t try
to make them elaborate, this isn’t 
a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence, in which 
another voice may speak.

Mary Oliver, Thirst

Tami Simon

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