Category: Psychology

Be What You Want to Receive: Three Ways to Experiment ...

At a time when we’re marinating in trauma and dealing with the test of a lifetime, we all wish things were different. When what we want from life is a million mile march from what it actually is, it can seem like we need a massive intervention to keep facing what’s at hand. 

But research shows that small things can make a big difference. Just like stress is cumulative, so are the daily steps we take to grow and give.

Microdoses of bravery add up. To start, consider moving from asking what will the world offer me, to what will I offer the world? Tiny bits of strategic courage are sources of nourishment that can help you become what you want to receive. 

Getting comfortable with the uncomfortable is a tall order, but worth doing. Microdosing bravery can help us build the strength and stamina that helps us heal, create, and liberate from fear, despair, and isolation. 

Here are three ways you can experiment with microdosing bravery including journal prompts for reflection.

Worth the Risk - Be What You Want to Receive

 

BE LOVE. 

Loneliness is being called “the new smoking,” a modern health risk. For some, the global pandemic has strengthened relationships, allowing for bonding and teamwork like never before. For others, it’s wreaked havoc: leading to feeling smothered and stuck. For those living alone, distancing has been brutal, making love feel far from reach. Loss, whether through death, divorce, breakups, or other factors, singes our hearts. We can become avoidant and skeptical of our future potential to love and be loved. 

When we strive to embody love, it’s essential to keep an open mind and heart. Loving connections are protective factors to our well-being. Consider these microdoses of bravery to strengthen your relationships, your sense of belonging, and the co-creation of new love paradigms in your life:

  • Get real. Go through your friends on social media and make a list of all the real people in your life with whom you can be yourself. Make a conscious effort to spend time outside of social media. Thank them for being so real to you and vow you’ll do the same.
  • Spark connection. Initiate a conversation with a partner or friend to see if you can build greater intimacy or camaraderie. To improve your connection, ask them what would mean a lot to them, and offer your own thoughts too.
  • Seek affinity relationships. Write a short poem or essay about yourself to clarify your various identities and then seek an affinity connection. Invite that person for coffee. Don’t shy away from sharing yourself and nudging them to do the same.
  • Be innovative. Create your own bravery microdose to help you be love.

Take note:

Write down what you chose to do and reflect on how it cultivated love in your life. Consider sharing this with someone you trust to help you maximize your efforts.

BE HEALING. 

The level of trauma at hand has ravaged our lives, making healing feel elusive on a good day, impossible on a bad. Given the magnitude of suffering at hand, healing should not be trivialized as a three-step process. Healing requires enormous courage. Microdosing bravery can help us reach out and tap in to the many forms of restoration available to us.  

Understanding how resilience works is a helpful way to begin healing. Gone are the days when it was viewed as a character trait—something you’re born with or not. There’s a lot of hype about being gritty and never letting anyone see you sweat that gets in the way of us finding the right support. Here are some ways to microdose bravery to foster healing and build resilience:

  • Recognize you’re not alone. The biggest lie our difficulties tell us is that we’re the only ones dealing with such intense suffering. All of us are living in a global mental health crisis, with exorbitant pressures and crushing circumstances. Suffering is part of our shared humanity. Finding solidarity and safe community can serve as a catalyst to healing. As we get traction in our own healing process, our acts of courage can be nourishing and healing to those around us.
  • Self-advocate. Healing requires intentional change in our communication. Many of us are comfortable and willing to give help, but few are asking for it. Identify one trusted person in your life that you know has the emotional maturity and skills to listen and support you. Tell them what you’re going through and work with them to identify potential roads toward healing, such as therapy, strategic behavioral change, and targeted self-care.
  • Set boundaries. Untreated trauma and unresolved issues can haunt us and impair the quality of our lives. By paying attention to what we say yes and no to, we can ensure we are leaving space for growth after we’ve gone through significant stressors. Find language to courageously share what you can commit to, and what you cannot. Enlist support to help you firmly protect your time so that you can devote attention to healing and restoration.
  • Identify resources. Take some time to scan your direct environment for things that nurture and sustain you. Select one or two things that can be microdosed to build your bravery.

Take note:

Write down things that help you experience healing. How can you continue to build off this?

BE A LIBERATOR. 

Society can project a lot onto us, caging us into patterns of conformity that can become harmful. Freedom to live as our truest selves isn’t something that comes with safety or ease. The work of unhooking from social prescriptions and ills can be fraught and exhausting. Still, when we find the courage to call out injustice and fight for a more humane world, we can experience exuberance and help change paradigms.

When we strive to liberate, we realize that we must dismantle oppression. That we must advocate for inclusivity and human reverence, particularly for social identities that are marginalized and harmed. Constrained living hinders human progress, individually and collectively. Consider these microdoses of bravery to liberate from social constructs that are harmful:

  • Let go. Take inventory of so-called social “norms” and become less apt to cower in the face of social impositions that are dismissive and destructive toward “difference.” Embrace your own multidimensionality, and that of humanity.
  • Speak up. We all have opportunities to be active contributors rather than passive bystanders in the world. Practicing accountability means that we call out injustice and work to eradicate forms of human suffering and imprisonment—whether based on race, gender, orientation, age, place of origin, or other social identity categories.
  • Practice human reverence. Move from me to we. See the glory and wonder across the human spectrum. Honor varied identities and perspectives. Work to find and engage in diverse relationships, rather than staying insular or spending time with those that look like, love like, and think like you. Become a liberator by standing fervently with those who’ve been marginalized, oppressed, or discriminated against. Seek ways to forge change, bit by bit.
  • Break Free. Create your own bravery microdose to help you liberate.

Take note:

What do you need to be liberated from? Do you know someone who is struggling in a similar way? How might you join forces and work together to become freer?

Author Kristen LeeKristen Lee, EdD, LICSW, is an award-winning Behavioral Science and Leadership professor, clinician, researcher, activist, comedian, author of Worth the Risk: How to Microdose Bravery to Grow Resilience, Connect More, and Offer Yourself to the World, and host of Crackin’ Up. She has over two decades of clinical experience in mental health, and twelve years of teaching and leadership roles in higher education, focusing on underserved populations. She leads the Behavior Science program at Northeastern University. For more, visit kristenlee.com.

 

 

 

 

Book - Worth the Risk

 

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Microdosing Bravery

Kristen Lee, EdD, LICSW, is an award-winning behavioral science and leadership professor, clinician, researcher, activist, comedian, and the author of Reset, Mentalligence, and with Sounds True, her newest book, Worth the Risk. The host of Crackin’ Up, she has over two decades of clinical experience in mental health and twelve years of teaching and leadership roles in higher education, focusing on underserved populations. She leads the Behavior Science program at Northeastern University. 

In this podcast, Kristen Lee joins Sounds True founder Tami Simon to talk about how strategically “microdosing” risk can cultivate courage and resilience in the face of challenge and adversity. Kristen and Tami discuss: embodying a sense of gumption and spirit; bringing mental health out of the shadows; measuring our risks against our values; how risk can nurture resilience; the importance of safe relationships; finding the right balance between being on the edge and being safe; anxiety as a “frenemy,” and how self-acceptance and compassion support healing and change; microdosing bravery in our creative pursuits; freeing ourselves from the need for external validation; moving from being a spectator to an active changemaker in the world and looking for ways we can begin our own process of active contribution; confronting your biases and prejudices; the illusion of perfection; the cult of overachievement; the new psychological safety; and more.

Becoming a Trauma-Informed Spiritual Explorer

David Treleaven, PhD, is a writer, educator, and trauma professional working at the intersection of mindfulness and trauma. He is the author of Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness and a visiting scholar at Brown University. David is the founder of Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness (TSM), a community of practitioners committed to setting a standard of care through mindfulness-based practices, interventions, and programs. 

Mindfulness meditation, yoga, and other spiritual practices bring many benefits, but for those struggling with trauma, those practices can actually amplify their symptoms. That doesn’t mean they should avoid these practices. By adopting trauma-sensitive principles, those healing from trauma often have the most to gain.

In this episode, Sounds True founder Tami Simon speaks with Dr. David Treleaven, a leading voice in Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness (TSM), to explore the five principles of TSM, why the breath is not always a neutral or safe object of attention, how to tell if an intense meditation experience is helping or not, when to lean in to your practice and when to change direction, techniques to re-ground and regulate, guidance for meditation teachers, the importance of supportive relationships in TSM, and much more.

Claiming Your Power as a Woman Business Leader

Iman Oubou is a Moroccan American entrepreneur, former beauty queen, and published scientist on a mission to change the women’s media landscape. Through her diverse experience with business, pageantry, and STEM, Iman noticed gender disparities in the workforce and an omnipresent bias across printed and digital media. She founded SWAAY, an all-in-one publishing platform for women, to champion the voices of female change-makers through the power of storytelling.

In this podcast, Sounds True founder Tami Simon speaks with Iman Oubou about her new book, The Glass Ledge: How to Break Through Self-Sabotage, Embrace Your Power, and Create Your Success, to share inspirational guidance for navigating the challenges facing today’s women entrepreneurs and change-makers. Tami and Iman discuss what Iman calls “the immigrant mentality,” or the need to to work twice as hard to stand out in a worthy and positive light; combining our inner work and outer efforts on the path to success; rising above a victim mindset; the interplay of resilience and surrender; becoming comfortable with the discomfort of uncertainty; examining your relationship with power; overcoming “impostor syndrome”; developing the courage and confidence to speak up more; balancing the desire to be both likable and respected; what it means to “compete in the right way”; and more.

Becoming Who You Are Meant to Be

Jean Shinoda Bolen, MD, is a Jungian analyst and clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco. An internationally renowned lecturer and workshop leader, she is author of The Tao of Psychology, Goddesses in Everywoman, Close to the Bone, Like a Tree, and more. She is also a fellow of the American Psychiatric Association (APA) and a past chairperson of the Council of National Affairs of the APA.

In this podcast, Dr. Bolen joins Sounds True founder Tami Simon to reflect on her many years as a writer, teacher, and activist, and how doing our “soul work” becomes the path to self-actualization, connection, and contribution throughout our lives. They also discuss our innate capacity for love and awe; becoming a whole-brain person; speaking up as a key aspect of individuation; gratitude and appreciation; the dandelion effect, or how seeds of beneficial ideas are carried to fertile ground; navigating liminal times; the predicament of “just doing time” with our lives; connecting with loved ones we’ve lost; becoming more familiar with your “dark side of the moon”; the metaphor of the millionth circle; and more.

The Inside Story: The Power of Interoceptive Awareness

Susan Sands, PhD, is a clinical psychologist known for her trailblazing work in female development and body-based disorders. She incorporates Buddhist thought and meditation into her work with patients. A former journalist, she publishes and presents widely on the topic of eating disorders and body image, and she is a core faculty member at the Psychoanalytic Institute of Northern California in San Francisco. 

In this podcast, Sounds True founder Tami Simon speaks with Susan Sands about her new book, The Inside Story, illuminating the surprising benefits that come with growing older and deepening our capacity to perceive our inner world more intimately. Tami and Susan discuss how interoceptive awareness is critical to our happiness as we age; body sense versus body image; the connection between having a high level of interoceptive awareness and having access to personal agency; how spiritual practices like meditation, mindfulness, and yoga help us cultivate interoceptive awareness; countering negative thoughts about our aging bodies by using “ageism disruptors”; developing a stable body image in our day to day lives; experiencing the pleasure of the inner body as we age; the positivity bias, and how it increases over time; the surprising beneficial physiological effects of aging; “mixed emotions” and the wisdom that comes with being older; the happiness curve, and how we can work to rewrite negative ageist narratives; addressing age inequality in today’s society; and more.

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