Category: Personal Growth

Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW: Essential Grief Education

Meghan Riordan Jarvis had been a practicing trauma therapist for almost 20 years. Then, in the course of two years, she lost both of her parents. “I came to understand what my clients had been telling me about for decades really, really differently,” she reflects. In this podcast, join Tami Simon in conversation with Meghan about Can Anyone Tell Me?, her new book that explores the most common and perplexing questions on how to navigate grief. 

Whether you yourself are facing loss or you’re looking for ways to support someone who is, give a listen to this compassionate conversation on: how to use stopping techniques to break the cycle of ruminating thoughts; the vagus nerve and the mind-body connection; nervous system co-regulation and creating a “triangle of support”; how grief affects the brain; the feeling of isolation that often accompanies grief; rewriting the narratives we tell ourselves; three simple universal strategies for moving through grief; becoming an effective supporter for someone in need; educating a grief-illiterate culture; working with the parasympathetic nervous system to expand your “window of tolerance”; the Box Breathing practice; why it’s important to validate our fears, even if we think they’re irrational; staying curious about what you can learn about yourself through the grief process; and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

Shelah Marie: Your Mess Is Your Power

Too many Black women are living other people’s stories for their lives, making themselves smaller to serve other people or society’s expectations. Shelah Marie is here to inform us that we can break free from cultural restrictions and our self-imposed barriers and unabashedly be who we really are, including our imperfections, our growth areas, our unacknowledged successes, and everything in between. In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Shelah Marie about her new book, Unruly, an empowering work that gives you full permission and practical support in fully being yourself. 

Tune in now as Tami and Shelah discuss: how specificity leads to universality; embracing our inner contradictions; the gifts of self-investigation; how many things can be true at the same time; the practice of writing a self-acceptance letter; ritual and celebration; performing true; “main character” energy; owning your mess; vulnerability and the courage to “show your seams”; becoming friends with yourself; the crooked room metaphor for the experience of being a Black woman; personal accountability and self-compassion; the Serious Daydreaming practice; and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

Terri Cole: High-Functioning Codependency—Breaking t...

High-functioning codependency? That’s not an oxymoron. For psychotherapist Terri Cole, a pattern emerged in her practice that led her to take a deeper look at what we traditionally define as codependent. With her new book, Too Much, Terri introduces high-functioning codependency (or HFC)—illuminating the key traits and behaviors associated with HFC, how it gets passed from generation to generation, and how we can finally break the cycle to reclaim our time, energy, and independence. 

Join Sounds True founder Tami Simon in conversation with Terri Cole about: giving unsolicited advice; the habit of auto-accommodating; the FAQ “is this codependent, controlling, or caring?”; the compulsive nature of codependency; when efforts to help backfire; allowing others to experience the consequences of their actions; giving without resentment; how to know if you’re an HFC; taking a resentment inventory; the emotional drivers of HFC; the environmental factors that propagate codependency; self-awareness on the path of recovery; tolerating the discomfort of changing our behaviors; the connection between being easily defensive and HFC; letting go of defensiveness as an HFC; getting back to your “just right”; and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

Learning the Art of Thriving Online

Amelia Knott is an art psychotherapist who specializes in the mental health impacts of hustle culture and social media. In the video below (3:22 minutes), she shares her inspiration behind her written and illustrated workbook, The Art of Thriving Online: Creative Exercises to Help You Stay Grounded and Feel Joy in the World of Social Media and invites you in on the journey of reimagining a healthier relationship with the digital world.

You can also read the video transcript below:

It’s been half my life—literally half the years of my life—lifting my chin for pictures, anticipating the critical gaze of a digital audience, offering my presence half-heartedly to the world around me to to draft a clever caption, choose a flattering filter, and watch as my phone tells me if this time my work will be rewarded with worthiness.

Too many nights avoiding myself, letting the blue-light-lullaby of my screen become a substitute for true soothing. It’s been half my life; holding up the mirror of comparison to everyone’s best days and hottest takes, highlight reels curated with effortless nonchalance, and now the mirror of comparison to a perfected self made in the algorithm’s image. It’s been half my life of fractured attention, commodified vulnerability, fury, and fear taking turns with despondence.

What if my real life stopped being my body or the land, and became the non-place I devote my hours to?

And it’s been half my life wandering daily into the galleries of artists’ and thinkers’ most beautiful ideas. Half my life keeping far-away loved ones close.

It’s true that the Internet gave me my career, my marriage. It made visible the threads of similarity across a quickly dividing globe. It showed me life-saving examples of people who survived what I needed to survive and it broke my heart open at the things no one should have to.

I like to misquote Carl Jung when he said something almost like “a paradox is our most valuable spiritual tool.” I’m not interested in finding the elusive, singular hack that will make screen time less alluring forever. I’m not interested in a lifetime of cycling through eras of detox and excess. Vacillating between the high of a new regimen and the crash of shame when social media works once again, exactly as it was designed.

I’m a therapist. I know that hacks can be tools, or bandaids. A self-help, step-by-step, sales pitch plan can feel like salvation, but it’s not the medicine of being in an evolving conversation with yourself. I am more interested in making art. I’m more interested in learning to tolerate the tension between social media’s danger and its magic. I’m more interested in learning to like myself, unsolved.

And when I’m learning the same lesson, again, the hard way, I know that my allies in finding safe passage through the digital age are art and writing. Creativity is how we imagine a different future.

So I wrote us this book. It’s a place to start that conversation with yourself about what is really happening between you and your screen; who profits from the ways it harms you, and how to protect the parts of it that are genuinely good, because parts of it are.

So if you are ready to join me—an art psychotherapist who both loves the life her phone enables and desperately needs to put it down—we’ll make some art. We’ll sit in the stunning and maddening paradox, and we’ll find creative ways to author our own definitions of real wellbeing when we choose to be on social media.

And together we’ll find the art of thriving online.

The Art of Thriving Online: A Workbook

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop | Sounds True

Amelia Knott

Special Episode: Outrage + Optimism

Since we’ve just completed the release of our 10-part series, We Are the Great Turning, we wanted to introduce you to another podcast with a spirit similar to ours: Outrage + Optimism.

The episode we’re going to play for you is called “Our Story of Nature: From Rupture to Reconnection.” It’s the first in a miniseries that shines a light on our relationship to the rest of nature. Remembering our place in the web of life is an essential part of building the Great Turning.

Be sure to subscribe to their podcast, and give them a follow on social media @outrageoptimism.

Now that this season of We Are the Great Turning is over, naturally, the question that’s emerging is … “What’s next?” As we consider whether to do a second season, we’d love to hear more about what you got from the first. What impact has it had in your life, and what might you love to hear from us next? Send us an email or a voice note at greatturning@soundstrue.com or send Jess a DM on Instagram @jess_serrante.

Ep 10 Bonus: The Shambala Warrior Prophecy

In Episode 10, “We Are the Great Turning,” Joanna shares a story called the “Shambala Warrior Prophecy,” which was told to her by her friend, Tibetan Monk Chogyal Rinpoche. Joanna was tasked with teaching this prophecy in the West, and it’s one of her most famous teachings. 

We wanted to separate the story from Episode 10 so that you can come back to the story again and again, whenever you need the inspiration and wisdom it offers. Here is Joanna telling the Shambhala Warrior Prophecy. 

We recommend starting a podcast club with friends or family to do these practices together. Links and assets to help prompt reflection and build community can be found with every episode on WeAreTheGreatTurning.com.

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