There is a famous Zen koan that asks, “What is your original face, the face you had before you were born?”
Whenever I have heard this koan, my first response is, “I have no idea how to answer that.” And of course, that is the purpose of a Zen koan, to confound the thinking mind and in so doing, wake us up to a deeper form of knowing.
One thing I have noticed is that the more I am able to sit in that not knowing state, to rest in a sense of “just being”, the more I can relax and feel what, if anything, is needed next. It is not a conceptual process; it is more like a listening. And from that listening, originality emerges (“original” meaning “from the origin” or “from the source”).
Waking up is not about copying anyone or anything. It can’t be. Because as soon as we are mimicking something, we are recycling someone else’s experience. We are one step removed from the source; we are no longer rooted in our own moment-to-moment revelatory experience.
My basic point here is that the more we discover our own Original Face, the face we had before we were born, the more confident we become in expressing ourselves in unique ways. In a sense, great spiritual teachers feel to me like great “artists of the spirit.” And like an inspired musician, poet, or painter, a spiritual artist knows that he or she must spend time in the space of not knowing and then trust the melodies, visions, words, and guidance that come through.
Sometimes people say to me that they are afraid of spiritual awakening because they are afraid of being erased, afraid that they will turn into a paste of nothingness. What I have found is that the more we drop the sense of being separate and disconnected, the more we tune to the underlying, unifying “hum” of being, the more we become plugged in to a current that begins to animate our life. And sometimes, the life force expresses through us in pretty outrageous ways. We take chances. We speak from our heart. We become a mystery to ourselves and a creative force in the world.
To take this even further, what if the more we discover our Original Face, the more our one-and-only physical face starts to express the love and beauty of the cosmos in unusual and distinctive ways? Abraham Lincoln is attributed with saying “Every man over 40 is responsible for his face.” I take this to mean that each one of us has a responsibility for the love and kindness and warmth and openness that our face communicates. What if the quality in our eyes, the shape of our mouth, the openness of our forehead, and even the character of our nose, is a direct expression of our capacity to know and rest in being?
At Sounds True, we often refer to the Wake Up Festival as a celebration of the “many faces of awakening.” And I love that phrase. I look forward to seeing each and every person’s one and only original face this August in the Rocky Mountains.
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you amaze me with your gentle, compassionate curious quetions…(sound of voice, pitch etc is 42% of communication). i have a broken neck (not paralyzed–hatt a miracle) ad s pretty rough TBI from being sideswwiped when i was on my scooter. i have incredible care a MAYO in dau cliare, and i have had wonderful help so osgten from your staff….are your staff awesome when they joine, or does that come with the territory? many blessings. you have helped me to cut 140.00 for 2 meds (seizures and migraines)…i listen to you, soothing me to sleep. (my husband says he has to compete with tammi). many blessings. my mantra is ‘choose to have an unreasonably happy day.’
it’s hilarious. i drank and drove til 82, and maybe this is karma. never injured anyone, but certainly could have. my last job (RN( was setting up group homes for people with TBIs. (hate the label). the day before i was hit, jeff (was a physician’s art) was an auktion, and for .33 got two walkers, two canes, and a shower chair. figured we’d ornate it to the mission….gotta laugh!. i am still grieving losses, but the part about self-compassion was incredible. (there’s alot of shame in AA and some in Alanon). i am more hesitant to speak, due to forgetting words and repeating myself, etc. but i chose that topic in both meetings, and i hope there is a ripple effect. we have a patio table, and income is a fraction (i get 860/month before meds, hand-van etc), vs. 25/hr with bennies. and ins is 850. but i could tell you amazig incredible hopeful, life-changing stories…of being on th other side, the amazing colors that make ours seem dull, the feeling of slipping out of a tight shoe.
oops–went on too long. anyhow, my tummy smiles when i think of you. and i have shared your healing and connecting from the heart 8di tyou know heart math? found it on craiglist nd i’ts awesome. ….know that you touch thousands of people, nd many probably just assume you know the idifference you make, the chances you’ve taken, the courage to speak from you heart, and i wanted to let you know what a difference you’ve made in your life.. I REMEMBER i think that’s stevvie wonder?!!! deb from eau claire