The Mystery of Holding

Sounds True —

July 21, 2015

There is an ancient longing wired in us as infants to be seen, to be felt, and to have our surging, somatic-emotional world validated by another. When our subjective experience is empathically held, contained, and allowed, we come to a natural place of rest. What is love, really, other than fully allowing the other to be who they are, for their experience to be what it is, and to offer the gift of presence to their unique subjectivity? In this sense, I love you = I allow you.

The late Donald Winnicott, a brilliant psychoanalyst from Britain, used the term ‘holding environment’ to describe the ideal mandala in which growth and development could occur, weaved of the qualities of contact and space. Through making attuned, present-time, somatically-engaged contact with another as they are – and by providing an open, warm sanctuary in which their experience can unfold and illuminate – we become vehicles of love in action.

Simultaneously, by offering the gift of space, we do not interfere with the unfolding of their heart and majestic inner process. We do not pathologize their experience or demand that they be different, change, transform, shift, or ‘heal’ in order for us to love them. If sadness is there, or fear, or despair, or shame, or depression, or profound grief, we will infuse their inner mandala with validation and presence. We will be there for them, but only if they need us. We will not engulf them with the projections of our own unlived life, nor will we unload upon them our own requirements and agendas, arising out of our own undigested psyches and bodies. Instead, we will seed the intersubjective container with tender space.

While not talked about as much, we can provide this same contact and space to ourselves and come to discover that our nature as awareness itself is in fact the ultimate holding environment. You are always, already resting in the majesty of presence and are always, already held – by the beloved – who is none other than your own miracle nervous system, heart, and somatic brilliance. While we may not always understand our experience – and while it may never fit into our ideas, hopes, dreams, and fantasies about the life we were ‘meant to live’ – we can come to trust that it is unfolding according to a unique blueprint which is emerging out of the unseen hand of love. We are invited to practice a radical intimacy with our experience, staying close to our ripe bodies and tender hearts, but not so close that we fuse or overly identify with it. Rest in the very middle and stay astonished at what is being birthed out of the unknown in every moment.

For so many I speak with, there is an undercurrent of aggression towards themselves, a subtle movement of self-loathing, unexamined shame and embarrassment, and a very alive (if not conscious) belief that they are flawed and have failed. Each time we exit our present, embodied experience into thinking, interpretation, blame, resentment, and complaint, we turn from the preciousness and the majesty of what we are. In this movement of rejection, we keep alive the archaic belief that our immediate experience is not valid, that it is not workable, that it is not forming the actual particles of the path of healing, exactly as it is. From one perspective, this may be seen as the ultimate act of self abandonment.

Let us all take a pause on this new day, and from a place of love visualize a holding environment for ourselves, where we grant unconditional permission to make intimate and direct contact with all of our vulnerabilities, with our tender bodies and with our raw hearts, with our unprocessed challenges from the past, and with our less-than-awakened thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

Let us make the most radical commitment to no longer abandon ourselves, exiting into our conditioned stories and unkind judgments, and inquire with love into the habitual belief that there is something fundamentally wrong with us. As we open our eyes and our hearts to the always, already present holding environment which is our true nature, we behold the drop of grace which pours through the eyes of everyone we meet, including that unknown precious one that we see when we look in the mirror. And then all that could possibly remain is an unshakeable faith in love’s perfection.

Posted July 21, 2015

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Six Summer Reads You Won’t Want to Miss!

Sounds True — July 3, 2018

After the stillness of winter and the slow waking of spring, summer is a time for getting up, getting out, and getting our hands on what inspires us the most. Here are some recent Sounds True releases for tapping into a life well lived.

1. The Biophilia Effect – Clemens G. Arvay

Summer Super Sale - The Biophilia Effect

This is a book that celebrates our interconnection with nature and shows how to deeply engage the natural world wherever you live to dramatically improve your health. Clemens G. Arvay presents fascinating research, practical tools and activities,

inspiring stories, and more in this accessible guide to the remarkable benefits of being in nature.

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/the-biophilia-effect.html

2. The Healing Code of Nature – Clemens G. Arvay

The Healing Code of Nature - Clemens G. Arvay

Human beings are inseparable from the natural world, coevolving with all of life. In order to thrive, we need to nourish this bond. In his latest book, biologist Clemens G. Arvay illuminates the miraculous ways that the human body interprets the living “code” of plants, animals, and our larger natural habitat for healing and sustenance.

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/the-healing-code-of-nature.html

3. Book of Beasties – Sarah Seidelman

Summer Super Sale - Book of Beasties

“From an ancient perspective, everything—including all natural things, like rocks, flowers, trees, insects, birds, and mammals

—is alive and infused with conscious energy or spirit,” writes Sarah Seidelmann. If you’re one of the many people looking to reconnect with the creativity, wisdom, and vital energy of the natural world, here is a fantastic guide for tapping into the power of animal totems, or “beasties.”

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/book-of-beasties.html

4. No Recipe – Edward Espe Brown

“Making your love manifest, transforming your spirit, good heart, and able hands into food is a great undertaking,” writes renowned chef and Zen priest Edward Espe Brown, “one that will nourish you in the doing, in the offering, and in the eating.” With No Recipe: Cooking as Spiritual Practice, Brown beautifully blends expert cooking advice with thoughtful reflections on meaning, joy, and life itself.

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/no-recipe.html

5. Yoga Friends – Mariam Gates & Rolf Gates

Summer Super Sale - Yoga Friends From the creators of Good Night Yoga and Good Morning Yoga comes a beautifully illustrated city adventure that introduces children to the delights and benefits of partner yoga.

Perfect for teaming up with a friend, sibling, parent, or caregiver, each easy practice shows how cooperation helps us to imagine, move, and have fun in a whole new way.

Includes a back-page guide for parents and caregivers, showing how to do each pose and how to connect them into an easy-to-follow flow.

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/yoga-friends.html

6. Happier Now – Nataly Kogan

What if you could be happier, right now, without radically changing your life? As nationally recognized happiness expert Nataly Kogan teaches, happiness is not a nice feeling or a frivolous extra. It’s a critical, non-negotiable ingredient for living a fulfilling, meaningful, and healthy life—and it’s a skill that we can all learn and improve through practice. In Happier Now, Nataly shares an illuminating, inspiring, and science-based guide to help you build your happier skills and live with more joy, starting now.

Get it here: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/happier-now.html

Have other books you’ve read by the poolside or under a shade tree ended up changing the way you see the world? Tell us about those summer reads that ended up being more than you expected!

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Singing Bowl Meditation Sounds True Spotify Playlist

Sounds True — November 29, 2017

Sounds True is on Spotify!

Need some tunes for rest and relaxation? Check out our Singing Bowl Meditation Playlist! A variety of artists who make a soothing mix of infinite rhythms using Tibetan singing bowls. Perfect throughout a meditative practice.

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November New Releases and Giveaway

Sounds True — November 20, 2017

NOVEMBER NEW RELEASES

The Integrity Advantage by Kelly Kosow

Are you ready to open up to new levels of self-trust and self-love, to get where you want to go?

You vowed to speak up at work, and then sat silent in the meeting yet again.

You told yourself “this time the diet is going to stick,” only to watch the scale inching up.

You felt that something just wasn’t right about someone that—until you learned the hard way that your instincts were right.

“Every time you bite your tongue,” teaches Kelley Kosow, “you swallow your integrity.”

Before Kelley Kosow was a renowned life coach and CEO, she constantly second-guessed herself, let her “to-do” lists and others steer her dreams and passions, and played it “small and safe.”

Inspired by the groundbreaking principles of her renowned mentor Debbie Ford, who hand-picked Kelley to be her successor, The Integrity Advantage is Kelley’s step-by-step guide for facing the fear, shame, and false beliefs that cause us to lose our way.

Through life-changing insights, true stories, and proven strategies, this book will show you how to live on your own terms—according to you—from the inside out.

Daring to Rest by Karen Brody

As modern women, we’re taught that we can do it all, have it all, and be it all. While this freedom is beautiful, it’s also exhausting. Being a “worn-out woman” is now so common that we think feeling tired all the time is normal. According to Karen Brody, feeling this exhausted is not normal—and it’s holding us back. In Daring to Rest, Brody comes to the rescue with a 40-day program to help you reclaim rest and access your most powerful, authentic self through yoga nidra, a meditative practice that guides you into one of the deepest states of relaxation imaginable.

It’s time to lie down and begin the journey to waking up

Breathe and Be by Anna Emilia Laitinen and Kate Coombs

Teaching mindfulness helps kids learn to stay calm, regulate their emotions, and appreciate the world around them. With Breathe and Be, author Kate Coombs and illustrator Anna Emilia Laitinen team up to present a book of poetry and art for young readers to make mindfulness easy, natural, and beautiful. Here is a book sure to delight parents and kids alike, blending lovingly illustrated nature imagery with elegant verse about living with awareness and inner peace.

Leopard Warrior by John Lockley

A Teaching Memoir That Crosses the Barriers Between Worlds

A shaman is one who has learned to move between two worlds: our physical reality and the realm of spirits. For John Lockley, shamanic training also meant learning to cross the immense divide of race and culture in South Africa.

As a medic drafted into the South African military in 1990, John Lockley had a powerful dream. “Even though I am a white man of Irish and English descent, I knew in my bones that I had received my calling to become a sangoma, a traditional South African shaman,” John writes. “I felt blessed by the ancient spirit of Africa, and I knew that I had started on a journey filled with magic and danger.” His path took him from the hills of South Korea, where he trained as a student under Zen Master Su Bong, to the rural African landscape of the Eastern Cape and the world of the sangoma mystic healers, where he found his teacher in the medicine woman called MaMngwev

Things That Join the Sea and the Sky by Mark Nepo

A Reader for Navigating the Depths of Our Lives

The Universe holds us and tosses us about, only to hold us again. With Things That Join the Sea and the Sky, Mark Nepo brings us a compelling treasury of short prose reflections to turn to when struggling to keep our heads above water, and to breathe into all of our sorrows and joys.

Inspired by his own journal writing across 15 years, this book shares with us some of Mark’s most personal work. Many passages arise from accounts of his own life events—moments of “sinking and being lifted”—and the insights they yielded. Through these passages, we’re encouraged to navigate our own currents of sea and sky, and to discover something fundamental yet elusive: How, simply, to be here.

To be enjoyed in many ways—individually, by topic, or as an unfolding sequence—Things That Join the Sea and the Sky presents 145 contemplations gathered into 17 themes, each intended to illuminate specific situations.

NOVEMBER GIVEAWAY

WIN OUR NEW RELEASE BUNDLE:The Integrity Advantage, Daring to Rest, Breathe and Be, Leopard Warrior, and Things That Join the Sea and the Sky

TO ENTER: Simply reply in the comments with why you’d like to win!

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Turning to my Filipino Roots to Tend to Womb Loss

Eileen S. Rosete — October 18, 2024

October is a meaningful month for me as it honors two important parts of my identity. It is Filipino American History Month, a time to acknowledge and honor the presence and contributions of Filipino Americans. Although my parents immigrated to the United States from the Philippines in 1980, records show that Filipinos were present here as early as 1587, landing in present-day Morro Bay, California as part of a Spanish galleon. In an interesting moment of alignment, I am writing this to you from Morro Bay, feeling the palpable power of the land and seeing the sacred 600-foot-tall Morro Rock–known as Lisamu’ in the Chumash language and Lesa’mo’ by the Salinan people–standing proudly just outside the window of our Airstream trailer. October is also Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, a time to increase awareness about and honor those of us who have endured such loss- what I often refer to as womb loss.

This October is particularly meaningful with my book, To Tend and To Hold: Honoring Our Bodies, Our Needs, and Our Grief Through Pregnancy and Infant Loss, officially launching on October 22. In it I share how my identities as a Filipina American and bereaved mother intertwine, and how valuable it can be for survivors of womb loss to turn to their cultural traditions for support as they grieve and as their postpartum bodies return to a non-pregnant state. How I came across this online essay and found solace in the language of my ancestors who use terms to describe miscarriage as “someone from whom something was taken away” rather than placing blame with the prefix mis- which means wrongly or badly. I did not carry my pregnancies wrongly or badly. Loss was something that my body experienced.

The following is an excerpt from To Tend and To Hold that I hold dear as it shares a traditional Filipino dish I grew up eating and that I share now as a postpartum doula to offer comfort and nourishment to those who are postpartum, both with living children and after loss. I hope it may offer you comfort as well, no matter if your experience of womb loss was recent, in the past weeks, months or even many years ago. My heart is with you and please know that you are not alone as you grieve and as you heal- at your own pace and in your own way.

I recently cooked this recipe for champorado, a Filipino rice porridge, for my beloved friend Katrina on a very tender anniversary, the due date of one of her children and the death date of another. Her child, Zeo Thomas, would have been born that day had he not died in the womb at five months gestation. It was within the same year of his death that her second child, Solis Vida, died in the womb in the first trimester. In truth, Katrina had been bleeding for over a week to release her second pregnancy, but as she bled through Zeo’s due date, she felt an intuitive pull to honor this same date as Solis’s death date. I thought of my friend as I made my way slowly through the grocery store. Though it was crowded and busy, I felt cocooned in my thoughts and intentions for her—how I wanted to help her feel seen and held during this difficult time—and I found myself gathering each of the ingredients in a mindful way that felt like the beginning of a bigger ritual. Knowing I was going to cook for her to honor her, her babies, her grief, and also her longings added a layer of reverence to what would otherwise be a standard grocery run. Later as I cooked the porridge in her home, I channeled my love and condolences into each step. And when I finally brought the warm bowl of champorado to her and saw her reaction, it was my turn to feel honored. Honored to be there with her. Honored to tend to her. And with a dish we both knew from our childhoods. She dubbed it “postpartum champorado,” and so it shall be known.

Warm and soft, rice porridge is one of the best postpartum foods as it is easy to eat, warming to the body, and gentle on the digestive system. Its very nature is to offer comfort. In my opinion, champorado, a Filipino chocolate rice porridge I grew up savoring, is one of the most heartwarming dishes, with the cacao tending as much to the emotional heart as to the physical body. It can be offered any time of day for both a filling meal and a gentle reminder that there is still sweetness in life even amidst grief.

In this nourishing version, cacao powder is used in place of cocoa so that we may benefit from all that this superfood has to offer, including iron to help rebuild red blood cells, flavonoids to improve blood flow, and magnesium to ease anxiety and depression. In addition to being nutrient-rich, cacao is also known to lift the mood. If the thought of preparing food feels beyond your current capacity at this moment, consider sharing this recipe with a partner, postpartum doula, or other support person and asking them to cook it for you. Additionally, if you are currently pregnant, please consult your health-care provider before consuming cacao as it contains caffeine.

Champorado: Filipino chocolate rice porridge

1 cup sweet rice (also called glutinous or sticky rice) or sushi rice
5 cups water
1/4 cup cacao powder
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 tablespoon unflavored protein powder (optional)
Condensed coconut milk for topping
Cacao nibs (optional)

Rinse the sweet rice several times until the water runs clear when drained.

Combine rice and water in a pot over medium-high heat. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to medium and continue to cook until the rice is soft and the porridge thickens (about 20 minutes), stirring often to keep from sticking to the bottom of the pot.

Add cacao powder, brown sugar, and unflavored protein powder. Stir to combine, then remove from heat.

Drizzle condensed coconut milk (or other milk of choice) and top with cacao nibs. Serve hot.

This is an adapted excerpt from To Tend and to Hold: Honoring Our Bodies, Our Needs, and Our Grief Through Pregnancy and Infant Loss by Eileen S. Rosete.

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Pānquetzani: Tune in to the Womb: Thriving Postpartum

Pānquetzani — September 26, 2024

Pānquetzani is a traditional herbalist, healer, and birthkeeper from a matriarchal family of folk healers from the valley of Mexico, La Comarca Lagunera, and Zacatecas. At a time when countless women in BIPOC communities are facing a maternal mortality crisis, Pānquetzani is working to bring back the nearly lost Indigenous approaches to childbirth and the postpartum journey. In her new book, Thriving Postpartum, she shares the sacred ritual of la cuarentena (or quarantine) that honors, nurtures, and empowers a birthing person’s transition into their new life.

Enjoy Tami Simon’s conversation with Pānquetzani exploring the philosophy of “use what you have,” sacred foods and using ritual in your approach to nutrition, sacrifice and reciprocity, community care and creating a collective framework for postpartum healing, maintaining your sovereignty (and sanity) within the Western medical system, the “postpartum doorstep drop off” and other simple ways to support new moms, postpartum depression from the perspective of traditional Mexican medicine, honoring the placenta, healing intergenerational trauma, the practice of tuning in to your womb, and more.

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Five Tips for Postpartum Bliss

Pānquetzani — September 11, 2024

Bliss out on baby, mi amor. Love your chichis. Admire your soft curves, your delicate belly, and the way you require intentional care. Everything deep comes to the surface as you pour sweat, milk, blood, and tears onto your sheets. I want your postpartum to feel blissful, so here are five tips to help you make that happen.

1. Make a postpartum plan.

You can’t plan exactly the way the birth will pan out, but you can plan the details of your postpartum support. Bodywork, meals, laundry, and childcare for your other children are some things to consider. Use this book as a guide to feel into what nonnegotiables you’ll need in place during la cuarentena.

2. Don’t DIY postpartum.

There’s a time and place for self-reliance. Postpartum ain’t the time. Postpartum traditions are community centered. Once you know that you’re pregnant, surrender to other folks holding you. Waddle that ass to circles with like-minded familias who you know would be down for mutual support. This is why we have the Indigemama community and so many other comunidades who are dedicated to saving our lives.

3. Shift your mindset.

One of the biggest internal challenges I see postpartum people go through is the mental chatter that puts a wall up, barring any chance for outside support. When we’re socialized into struggling and then rewarded for doing things on our own, it’s easy to feel guilty asking for help. You might be distrustful of other people’s capacity to fulfill your needs. How many times have you heard women say, “If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself”? This belief sets postpartum people up for anxiety, stress, depression, and overwhelm. If you want postpartum done right, you have to feel in your body that you are worthy of being venerated; you must feel that you are deserving of being held.

Paying homage to you is paying homage to nature itself. Give your potential supporters that opportunity to connect with creation.

4. Repeat after me: affirmations, affirmations.

It’s easy to feel ashamed to ask for what you need. It’s normal to feel guilty when you see how hard people are working for you. Give yourself a pep talk: I allow myself to be cared for. I accept this help. I trust that I can be held without lifting a finger. I surrender myself to the love and labor of others. I soften and allow myself to be carried. I want you to do this every moment that you need it. When you affirm that you’re doing the right thing over and over, then eventually it becomes second nature.

5. Support your romantic relationship.

Postpartum is stressful AF! Those of us with multiple children can tell you that the little ones tend to take precedent over romantic relationships. But after a while, that really weighs down a union. Plan relationship goals. When will you start to date again? What’s the plan for one-on-one time? Who are the people who hold you and your partner(s) up as a sacred union? What baggage can you each decide to let go of now? What support can each of you get individually from healthy older couples who are content with each other? What can you appreciate about each other during la cuarentena? What words do you need to say to each other when the going gets tough? Nurturing a healthy, loving relationship with each other when you’re parenting children is a practice of discipline.

This excerpt is from Thriving Postpartum: Embracing the Indigenous Wisdom of La Cuarentena by Pānquetzani

Pānquetzani

Pānquetzani comes from a matriarchal family of folk healers from the valley of Mexico (Tenochtitlan, Texcoco, and Tlaxcala), La Comarca Lagunera (Durango and Coahuila), and Zacatecas. As a traditional herbalist, healer, and birth keeper, Pānquetzani has touched over 3,000 wombs and bellies. Through her platform, Indigemama: Ancestral Healing, she has taught over 100 live, in-person intensives and trainings on womb wellness. She lives in California. For more, visit indigemama.com.

andreia says:

December 5, 2015 at 5:47 am

Hello! thanks for the text! Who is the author? thanks! 🙂

Vicki Albin says:

December 5, 2015 at 6:06 am

Baby Massage has a technique called containment. When the parents see the simplicity and magic of it, their eyes open wide. But when baby offers an opportunity for them, it moves them to a new depth of understanding that is palpable in the room. Beautifully written article. Thank you.

Tina says:

December 5, 2015 at 7:20 am

Just found this… beautifully written, poignant, moving and just the right time for it to land in my awareness. Thank you, Matt.

Lina Cuartas says:

December 5, 2015 at 10:22 am

I have felt this specific current of thought and emotion since the month started, as i massaged and held a beloved child of miine afflicted with self- doubt and sadness, as i watched my better half struggle with duties and self-loathing, as i see the world debate hatred and love; inclusion and rejection; and i dreamed about the christmas offering i have to make this year. i am behind, my revered tradition of making a nativity instead of buying stuff is usually done by the end of november. But, this year has been like a riptide.
i saw what i have always known and voiced in a uniquely beautiful, simple treasure: within its dainty cap of tousled fibers, an acorn, in which, an embryo, still enfolded with the amniotic sac of life, can be clearly seen; tiny, perfect palms and soles discernible, faces in different, subtle, innocent positions and gestures, to remind us all; we are all born and return to the ocean of existence in the same way; seeds of possibility,power and promise, and we are all linked together by invisible but unbreakable threads of causality; We are One.
Today is the day I will make the first babies, playing Creator, and These reminders of Oneness i will not confine to this season of Rebirth; i will continue creating them, sharing them, giving them away to voice their message from Beyond,; the Wise Waters we come from and return to, unavoidably.

Rebecca says:

December 5, 2015 at 1:31 pm

Beautiful

lilliswansonLilli Swanson says:

December 5, 2015 at 2:51 pm

This is absolutely the best article I have EVER read on the love an care of a baby or the baby in us…or anyone, actually!!

00margot says:

December 5, 2015 at 8:35 pm

This is a beautiful description of love.

Serafina Perez says:

December 5, 2015 at 10:18 pm

Another validation,” Angels On Earth.”

bianca schriek says:

December 6, 2015 at 2:18 am

Thanks!

Saras Naidoo says:

December 6, 2015 at 3:30 am

Beautiful.

Rhona says:

December 6, 2015 at 5:17 am

Love this…thank you

Heather Mac says:

December 6, 2015 at 6:28 am

Tears of gratitude for this amazing insight. It is perfect, as is everything. Thank you, love you <3

Samantha says:

December 6, 2015 at 7:15 am

Beautiful reflection, thank you.

madlyn says:

December 6, 2015 at 9:46 am

so beautiful

Rifka Hirsch says:

December 6, 2015 at 11:33 am

Beautiful. Thank you so much for this sharing. It enters my heart … in this perfect moment.

Paige Bartholomew says:

December 6, 2015 at 11:54 am

I’m a therapist. I read a lot. I talk to a lot of people. I study. But it’s been a very long time since I’ve read an article so poetically and potently worded, which speaks of the MOST important topic I can imagine: the ACT of love. As you say, Love is allowing. Love is allowing our self to be as we are. Love is allowing others to be exactly as they are. I appreciate how you outlined some of the pathological (insane) things we do to ourselves and each other. That made the difference between LOVE and NOT-LOVE crystal clear. Thank you with all my heart. <3 Paige

Eric Monroe says:

December 6, 2015 at 12:32 pm

Amazing, thank you so very much. This truly spoke to me and I will share it in the hopes that it will speak to others as well. May we all heal ourselves and help one another to heal as well. Blessed Be!

bcornell says:

December 6, 2015 at 1:21 pm

Thank you! So well spoken…many need to hear and experience this.

BiancaD says:

December 6, 2015 at 4:06 pm

Beautifully written. Thank you ^_^

Leila Kaddouri says:

December 6, 2015 at 4:13 pm

Beautifully written. Thank you.

Heather says:

December 6, 2015 at 4:57 pm

THANK YOU <3 so much.

Sarah MacLaughlin says:

December 6, 2015 at 5:47 pm

Lovely, lovely, lovely.

Rita Bridenstine says:

December 6, 2015 at 6:28 pm

Amen. The essence of peace on earth.

Bhimi says:

December 6, 2015 at 7:17 pm

So eloquent and sensitively said, I could feel each word as it slide from my brain to my heart. Everyone should read that at least 1x everyday.

Inner Compass says:

December 6, 2015 at 7:51 pm

beautiful. thank you.

Harmony Gates says:

December 7, 2015 at 12:21 am

Awesome. Just as I knew and know it is. And receiving physical ‘holding’ can remind us of this somatic, universal loving embrace that our Being holds us in.

pinkartkitchen says:

December 7, 2015 at 7:18 am

beautiful words which resonate deeply

Annie Brook says:

December 7, 2015 at 10:05 am

yes, Matt! Returning to love with that ancient longing satisfied and whole! I have spent a lifetime going back and doing integrative discovery and body-mind work to recover interrupted bonding due to being born early and placed in the NICU without any touch allowed from my mother for 17 days. It is inside out work to reclaim a challenged nervous system and primoridal beliefs that babies set up about whether they are loveable.

The good news is that we really can return to wholeness. I just returned from presenting at BirthPsychology.com to therapists and caregivers. I shared how birth imprints show up in child and adult behaviors, and tools to help individuals, children, or couples. All of this is gathered in my recent book, Birth’s Hidden Legacy. I wrote this to help others have the tools to get to the root of distress that was imprinted so long ago. It has case studies, body-mind theories, and interventions you can use to help yourself or others.

With accessible tools, returning to an internal feeling of love and safety opens the door for the true path of soul into body. You can get Birth’s Hidden Legacy, on Amazon or directly on my web site, http://www.anniebrook.com/shop. Last summer I was fortunate to train teachers at the Montesorri Education Center of the Rockies in Boulder, CO, on on how to work with the infants and children they see, and will present at their national conference in Chicago this coming March. Let’s keep spreading the word and opening the heart.
Joy and love to you…Annie Brook

Joe Costigan says:

December 10, 2015 at 6:37 am

Arthur Janov Phd, The creator of Primal Therapy has written a number of books relating to this and through his therapy resolve or at least lessen much of the repressed emotional pain related to being untouched and unloved.

Aurora Brown says:

December 11, 2015 at 11:09 pm

Thank you! Very appropriate at this time with all the tragedies that are happening globally. This touches my heart and it is so true. Holding environment, unconditional love, room to grow and allowing one to be the best person one can be. Patience, nurturing, global connection to every one.

Kathy Patrice Pitts says:

December 12, 2015 at 8:52 am

Beautifully said. Thank you.

Janice Cathey says:

December 13, 2015 at 7:21 am

As a therapist who specializes in Shiatsu/Watsu/Breema I’ve had the honor to hold space for the unfolding in my life and practice. If you have an opportunity seek a therapist near you who provides somatics it will be worth your energy and time. Blessings to all

Denise Germaine Levinson says:

December 14, 2015 at 5:14 pm

Beautiful ,thank you for sharing!!!!

Tamara says:

December 14, 2015 at 6:55 pm

My Group Therapy in Paris, France, benefited that our psycholgist had BBSOL training, and our group felt this containment each session we had together.

Laura says:

December 16, 2015 at 6:39 am

This is so beautifully written. No matter what happened or didn’t happen to us as infants/children/adults, we can all heal in this way. I do believe there is some divine interface as well, but this holding and be-ing happens in our bodies. Thanks for putting clear words to my holding experience. And let us hold each other in this way too. Peace…

Anahata Giri says:

December 16, 2015 at 8:35 pm

Astonishingly beautiful words. So deeply true. I will read this again and again. Thank you.

Bridget Holding says:

December 17, 2015 at 1:51 am

I am a psychotherapist, and work helping people to express themselves through words ‘wild words’. This is a beautifully written article, on such an important subject. Thank you

Annemcx says:

December 17, 2015 at 12:55 pm

Thank you, from my heart.

Jenny Ridley says:

December 18, 2015 at 1:24 am

This says it all and so beautifully. Now we need to LIVE our lives holding onto these precepts.

Sue James says:

December 18, 2015 at 10:56 pm

There is tendency in this age of the material to think that close bonding with babies and the rest of our species should not be encouraged. Even as adults touch, holding, granting being is one of the most generous and beautiful gifts we can give to each other. We all need each other, Rolando Toro the maverick from Chile used to say that the very best medicine for human beings, is simply “human beings”. When we embrace each other with affection, tenderness, empathy and love, when we allow each other to be who they are without attempting to fix them or mend and to always see the greatness that is present in everyone, Love is what is left in the space. Beautifully written. Thank you

Ted says:

January 12, 2016 at 8:56 am

One of the best definitions of “Love” I’ve come across. The message resonates with me in such a subjective manner that I often want to come back and feel it again. Well done Matt.

Robert logsdon says:

January 15, 2016 at 8:46 am

So good to finally read of you and your work. The article on love is true, beautiful and good.
Robert

Grethe Lund says:

January 20, 2016 at 1:46 pm

Thank you ! This is beautifully written and just what I needed to read now…… I´m sharing…..

Sharman says:

March 18, 2016 at 12:52 am

Its amazing isnt it thst all we need is really at our fingertips! Grace. Thankyou.

The Mystery of Holding - Andrea Roth Counselling says:

June 14, 2016 at 5:20 am

[…] The Mystery of Holding […]

Lilli says:

December 5, 2016 at 5:45 am

Reading this article one year after the first time, is like falling in love all over again…with Life.

Matt Licat says:

December 5, 2016 at 9:57 am

It’s nice to hear from you, Lilli, and than you for sharing your kind words here. with love, matt

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David White-Miller says:

March 8, 2019 at 5:53 am

I read this and cried with joy, sadness and regret at the wasted times filled with anger and remorse

Harmony Gates says:

March 8, 2019 at 10:46 am

I shared this on FB when it first came out…This is also what I’ve discovered and practiced in my life and work. I cannot say it better. I’ve also shared your Blog with many many friends and clients. Thanks Matt

Heart-Centered Community says:

March 13, 2019 at 3:49 pm

[…] “The Mystery of Holding,” The Sounds True Blog […]