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The Guru Question

Tami Simon speaks with Mariana Caplan, PhD, a psychotherapist, cultural anthropologist, and professor of yogic and transpersonal psychologies at the California Institute of Integral Studies. She is the author of six books in the fields of psychology and spirituality, including Eyes Wide Open: Cultivating Discernment on the Spiritual Path and her newest book with Sounds True, The Guru Question: The Perils and Rewards of Choosing a Spiritual Teacher. In this episode, Tami speaks with Mariana about who needs a dedicated spiritual mentor, what to look for and what to avoid when seeking a teacher for yourself, and the path of “conscious discipleship”—what it means to be a great student. (72 minutes)

Despair Cracks Open Your Heart

Mary Pipher is a clinical psychologist whose area of expertise is how contemporary US culture influences the mental health of its citizens. She is the author of the New York Times bestselling book Reviving Ophelia, and recently contributed to the Sounds True anthology Darkness Before Dawn: Redefining the Journey Through Depression. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Mary and Tami Simon discuss the connection between despair and a lack of trust, as well as how personal writing can be a panacea for hopelessness. Mary also shares advice for journeyman therapists who are dealing with clients buried deep in their own despair. Finally, Mary and Tami talk about how despair can crack the heart wide open. (52 minutes)

Relationship as spiritual practice

My husband and I recently attended a talk that Bruce Tift gave at the Shambhala Center in Boulder titled Relationship as a Path of Awakening. Bruce Tift, LMFT, is a private-practice therapist and instructor at Naropa University here in Boulder. (In the interest of full disclosure, I must say that Bruce is also a Sounds True author with an amazing audio program titled Already Free.) In his talk, Bruce discussed at length the both magical and disturbing nature of intimate relationships and how important it is to continually nurture and accept one another, while simultaneously and unabashedly encouraging growth. He highlighted common relationship patterns that he often sees in his private practice and helped trace them back to childhood—namely survival skills that we established upon first connection with our mothers, which no longer serve us. It should be noted that Bruce was not talking about survival skills which could be considered obvious reactions to abuse or neglect from a parent. Instead, he was referring to seemingly innocent details, such as our mothers’ own self-confidence, and how those nuances come to fruition in our adult lives and inform how we ultimately view the world, connect in intimate relationships, parent our children, etc. For me, discovering how much our lives are perpetually infused by even the minutest aspects of intimate relationship was both a beautiful and terrifying realization. How can we ever be fully aware of the implications of our behavior?

In his talk, Bruce also emphasized the need for couples to develop what he calls “healthy intimacy,” which involves building a strong connection, while at the same time fostering a sense of healthy separation. In Bruce’s opinion, the juxtaposition of connection and separation encourages couples to build a sense of individual independence and to shed their own self-limiting behaviors, while also fostering a depth of adoration and understanding for one another and their collective experience. What most resonated for me in Bruce’s talk is that individual development is only as effective as collective development—for in intimate relationship, the two are ultimately one. No matter how much progress we may make individually, if we’re not progressing in step with one another, our collective experience will be perpetually fractured. While this has always been obvious to me when it comes to goals and alignment related to our outer life—finances, health, travel, family, etc.—I’ve never viewed our inner spiritual goals as those that require the most attention and ultimately make our relationship work.

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As relative newlyweds, my husband and I are continually exploring relationship and the role that intimate relationships in particular play in one’s practice or personal growth. While people typically rely on those closest for nurturing and support, it is also those close to us who are best equipped to cast light on all our shadows. But how do we strike the balance between building the nest and deconstructing old patterns? How can we encourage one another to be vulnerable and to break our hearts wide open in relationship, while simultaneously using that same openness to examine and cast each others’ skeletons out of the closet? How do we prevent the very delicateness that we create within intimacy from also being used against us? In Bruce’s words, how do we negotiate the hard fact that our most beautiful and unconditional relationships can also be the most disturbing?

Light Watkins: Putting Your Heart-Voice into Action

What is spiritual minimalism? How do we “declutter” ourselves so we can hear and take action on the voice of our hearts? In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with meditation teacher and author Light Watkins about his new book, Travel Light, and his “inside-out” approach to pushing past your limits to find and fulfill your purpose. 

Tune in for a lively conversation that offers encouragement, inspiration, and practical insight, as Tami and Light discuss meditation as a tool to create space and hear the calling of your heart; taking action on your “why”; curiosity and trust; the heart as our personal GPS; leaving our comfort zones to begin our Hero’s Journey; the universe as your personal trainer; the “scary yes” and recognizing the feeling tone of the heart; the subtle disguises of the ego; the practice of split-testing your inner voices; rewiring your personality for greater alignment with your values; authenticity and service to others; doing less to accomplish more (really!); creating adventure instead of drama; and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

Caroline Myss: Healing Beyond Reason

Tami Simon speaks with Caroline Myss, a pioneer in the field of energy medicine. Caroline is a medical intuitive, mystic, and author of four New York Times bestsellers, as well as the Sounds True audio learning programs Energy Anatomy, Sacred Contracts, and Transforming Trauma. In this interview, Caroline discusses the nature of the soul and what it means to heal beyond reason. (55 minutes)

Pith Instructions

Tami Simon speaks with Lama Surya Das, one of the best-known American-born lamas in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. He’s the author of the books Awakening the Buddha Within and The Mind is Mightier than the Sword. With Sounds True, he’s created seven programs, including the audio learning programs Tibetan Dream Yoga and Buddha Is As Buddha Does, as well as a book/CD package called Natural Radiance: Awakening to Your Great Perfection. Lama Surya Das discusses recognizing our buddha nature, waking up to the nature of mind, and leads us in a Tibetan dream yoga practice. (57 minutes)

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